Redneck Lesson of the Day

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Hillbilly Language Lesson

Hogback: A mountain ridge that slopes sharply on each side and often has jutting rocks, resembling the high narrow back of a wild hog.  He liked to run his beagles through the hogback. [Read more…]

Leaking Jesus

Some people live lives which appear so much bigger after they die. You know the sort I mean. You find yourself sitting in a pew listening respectfully as others eulogize the newly deceased and all the while you are feeling like you stumbled into the wrong service. You leave shaking your head, wondering how, given the numbers of [Read More…]

Trip with Tay

I won’t be at church in the morning. Instead I’ll be heading over the pass. My niece, Taylor, and I are going to a Brandon Heath concert at The Rialto in Tacoma. It’s a fund-raiser for Restore International. Bob Goff, the founder/CEO of Restore International sent me an invite to the concert. I love Brandon [Read More…]

Hitch & Blair: The Debate

That beloved atheist Hitch is at it again. Perhaps you heard? He and Former British Prime Minister Tony Blair had a public row about all things religion.  A reported 2,600 people turned out Friday at Toronto’s Roy Thompson Hall to hear these two gents. Okay. Well, row might be too strong of a term. They had a public [Read More…]

Hillbilly Language Lesson

Go to grass: verb phrase. Friendly euphemism for go to hell. Example: “You can go to grass for all I care. There’s no way Linda Sue would ever leave that man after he done bought her that pink Cadillac.” [Read more…]

Sweet Home Alabama

  Christ United Methodist Church Womens Conference, Feb. 12, 2011. Creative people thrill me. So imagine my delight when the ladies at Christ United Methodist Church in Mobile sent me the above logo for an upcoming conference. I was so tickled at their adaptation of the topic I provided them that I wrote and asked [Read More…]

Hillbilly Language Lessons

Scarify: verb. To drain blood by making cuts or scratches, a treatment designed to relieve ailments. Example: If you wrastled with a three-day headache, you best get you a razor and scarify that thang. Other: When a baby has the bold hives, its fingernails turn black. What you did was turn the baby on its stomach and [Read More…]

The Justice Conference: Don't Miss It

By David Jacobsen A farmer works the ground with primitive tools from sunup to sundown, earning eighty-seven cents for a day of back-breaking labor. A girl looks out the tiny window in her brothel, wondering if this small slice of sky is the only view of the world her pimp will ever let her have. [Read More…]

This how you do me, God?

By now I suspect you have all heard the story about wide receiver Steve Johnson dropping the ball in the end zone. Johnson had the opportunity to give the Buffalo Bills one of their sweetest victories — an unexpected win against the Steelers in overtime. Instead the 24-year-old dropped the ball. My husband, whose passion for [Read More…]

Hillbilly Term of the Day

    British Soldier: noun. A lichen that blooms bright red in early spring when snow is still on the ground. The term comes from the reference to British Soldiers and their red coats, although some folks refer to it as Matchstick lichen. British Oil was also a commonly used term among the mountain people [Read More…]

S*&t My Daughter says

Yesterday my daughter Ashley and her husband Zack dropped by the house on their way back to Spokane. Shortly before heading out on the road again, Ashley took a potty break. Her father and I and Zack were sitting in the adjoining living room when all of sudden we heard Ashley yell, “S*&T!” Ashley doesn’t [Read More…]

Language Lessons

I’ve been at work on a novel. If all goes according to my plan that novel will be out sometime late next year.  But there’s a lot of work that needs to be done yet in order for that to happen. The first of which is I’m going to have to teach all of you a new [Read More…]

White Silence

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A gift from RM's Daddy

Sister Tater and I sat down this morning and watched THIS and wept at the beauty of it all. We both want one.  Uncle Buck walked away: “I don’t want to cry,” he said. I used to wonder why old people were so tender-hearted around babies. Now I understand it. [Read more…]