Thankful Tuesday: 8 Years

Christopher, when we were first dating, riding in cars together, my fingers running through the back of your hair (What was I thinking? I barely knew you!), you amazed me. You were the quirkiest boy I’d ever met . You said things like, “Let’s just be cozy and watch a movie.”

Cozy? What 23 year old boy says, Let’s just be cozy? You still do.

So does your son. The other day, with new friends playing in the sprinkler, I wrapped August up in a towel and he smile wide up at me, said: “Mama, I love being cozy in this towel.” My new friend laughed. “I’ve never heard a little boy talk about being cozy,” she said.

Of course our little boy does. Saturday afternoons, you gather him up on the couch, both of you looking at your own books, until you both fall asleep snuggled under soft blankets. You both call it “being cozy.”

When we were dating, you whispered a secret on a late summer night at your grandparent’s 50th anniversary weekend. We were snuggling in an outdoor lounge chair, under bright stars on the Chesapeake Bay, speaking serious words. You told me you loved me.  And then, about the yellow middle school track shirt you had determined in 8th grade would one day be given to your wife. Why that shirt? I can’t remember: it’s coziness, I’m sure.

That next week, it was in my possession. I slept in it all that July.

What is the moment when two people fall in love? That first weekend we dated and the snow and cuddle on the couch after and my bloody nose the moment we first held hands? I laughed and screamed and ran for the bathroom, hysterical and horrified. But you followed me, stood beside me in the bathroom while I held that bloody kleenex to my face. Well, I said, might as well get to know the real me. And you did.

The Real Me has been exposed many more times, in the ugliest of ways, I’m afraid. And still, even after the bloody nose, even after the nasty fighting words, even after my selfish demands and my passive aggressive dealings, you kiss me like you did that night. You always mean it.

When is the moment two people fall in love? When we held hands, dressed up, seeing  Les Mis in the Great Big City? That first fight when you got us lost and cursed and the flock of geese landed on the road in front of us? (And I learned to be in charge of the map figuring.) When we moved into that tiny apartment in Devon and made every meal together at 8 pm? When we walked around Valley Forge and prayed about who we were going to be, what God was going to make us? Both hospital rooms on separate coasts where each of our boys appeared on the earth?

When does love happen? In the bathroom in the mornings, both of us leaning into those tiny mirrors and tiny sinks we shared all those years? At the table, taking food to our lips, speaking normal words? Laughing on the couch, you tickling me even though I Hate Being Tickled?

When did I fall in love with you today? That’s the better question, isn’t it? When you kissed those boys, unable to stop whispering secrets in their ears?

A couple of weeks ago we were talking about the vacation we’ll take together in the fall, just us without the kids. You said, Just think! We’ll finally get to talk about really important, deep things.

I laughed. That’s all we do talk about, babe. What we’ll actually do is sit and drink a whole cup of coffee together and not get up. We’ll sit together long enough that we’ll run out of kid talk and theology talk and we’ll finally talk about nothing at all. And that will be the best part.


Until then, my dear … Happy eight years.


It’s Thankful Tuesday, what are you thankful for? Link up in the comments and share!
Thankful Tuesday: Hay and Apples
Thankful Tuesday Halloween Style
An Invitation to be Lonely
Thankful Tuesday: Tomatoes, Friends, Kite-Flying Wind
  • fiona lynne

    Eek, eight years?! So many congratulations! Wishing you many more cosy years…

  • Stephanie Spencer

    What a beautiful love story! This post is a wonderful tribute to your husband and to your marriage.
    There are so many posts in the blogosphere about how difficult marriage is (which is true) or how frustrating love can be (which is also true). But, it can all start to feel so cynical. This post was a beautiful breath of fresh air to me.

    My husband and I will hit our 12th anniversary this August. And I really, truly, love him more now than I did the day we said “I do.”

  • Sarah Bessey

    Congratulations! love that questions: when did I fall in love with you today?

  • Amy

    I’ve got a cozy husband too :-) Beautifully written, as always.

    Today I’m thankful for the lake in summer.

  • Katie @ cakes, tea and dreams

    I love this. Such gorgeous prose, such tender moments. Happy eight years.

  • Sillydoodah (Dawn)

    Oh, yay! My husband is always in my lists of thankfuls too. Congratulations!

  • Shanna |

    You’ve got me all teary-eyed. Beautiful post.

  • Kristen

    Beautifully said as always, dear friend. Wishing you an abundance of blessings for the next 8 and many, many more after that!
    Thankfulness was more difficult in my little world today, but I managed. :-)

  • michaboyett

    Oh, Kristen. I loved your post. (Every one else should check it out as well.) Thanks for your vulnerability and for sharing about Mr. Harry’s sweet soul. Love and peace, friend.

  • michaboyett

    Thanks to all of you for the kind words today. I’m so grateful I get to share my anniversary thinkings with all of you. : ) I’m glad you’re my friends.

  • michaboyett

    This post is so beautiful, Amy. I’m about to get on Twitter and shout loud for every one to take a look at it!

  • suzy

    Beautiful job Micah and congratulations! I love how your little boy is an image of his daddy – down to the words. It’s fun seeing your children grow up and imitate the good in us as parents. I still laugh at how my son (21 years) stands just like his dad. Wishing you many, many more wonderful anniversaries!

  • Stacey

    Sweet and lovely. Happy anniversary.

  • Diana Trautwein

    Hey – it worked! I got this in my inbox. Hooray! And what a lovely gift to receive today – happy anniversary to both of you. I’d say you each received great gifts from our good God….one another. I’m thankful, in the aftermath of the Big Weekend Holiday, for a good dad and all that means in the life of a girl/woman.

  • Leah Colbeck

    I have been quietly reading your blog for a while now but your post on your daughter’s baptism and this one back to back have left me wanting to comment and thank you for writing about love so freely. Always a joy to have my heart filled with a good love story.

  • Sarah Friend

    Micha – have you been connected with Church of the Good Samaritan in any way in the recent past? I was a member of the congregation there for 10 years before I married my husband (in the chapel :0) and moved away from the Philadelphia area ( the middle 5 of those years it was a long distance relationship – I was living and ministering in the Middle East, supported by Good Sam)…..just wondering.

    Also, I have been for some time trying to take hold of a way to find contemplative space in my busy life as a wife, mom, teacher, etc., and your blog gives me hope. Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability!

  • Shannon Coelho

    Micha, this is such a sweet and funny post. I love these glances back at your love story. Thanks for sharing.

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