My 10 Favorite Hiding Places

Many people who reveal and expose so much of themselves give the impression that they are authentic, real and vulnerable. I’ve long since learned that when someone gives that impression, they are usually (not always) using this impression of authenticity as smoke and mirrors to deflect people from their truest selves. Why? Because they may be deeply ashamed of who they really are, fear rejection, or need to be admired and accepted. They could also be your typical INFPs who hunger for the authentic in an obsessive kind of way. Lots of reasons. I probably fall into this camp. So, in the spirit of this thought, I thought I’d expose to you my favorite hiding places… which is a kind of trick because when I really want to hide, I really don’t want you to find me. So from today on, my favorite hiding places will change until you stop looking for me in my original hiding places, then I’ll go back to them. Here are 10:

  1. My home studio (usually painting and listening to loud music)
  2. My study at the church (usually studying, thinking, blogging, writing)
  3. In the car (usually driving and listening to loud music)
  4. In a movie (in the evening, with a beer or glass of wine, with Lisa)
  5. On my back deck (having a pipe or barbecuing an animal)
  6. In a book (usually philosophy or esoteric spirituality, or science and theology)
  7. At a friend’s or party (enjoy the skin you’re in!)
  8. Taking a walk (with my pipe, my dog, my wife, myself… we love the woods)
  9. Behind me (that’s right… I’ll put forward a self that I can hide behind)
  10. God (my life is now hidden with Christ in God… can I disappear?)

What’s your favorite hiding place?

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  • Jo the Canadian wanna be

    I have too many. I am the person you described in your ‘analysis.’ Here are a few hiding places: In God, like you said, but for me, it’s so easy to just spiritualize everything so that “I” am hidden to the point the “Me” of me is smothered out by pseudo-piety, jargon, and “faith” over and against worry/loss. In Music, because it’s easy to get lost in the tune and the rhythm. In movies, because you enter someone else’s story and you don’t have to think about your own (same for fiction books). In the car, because you can get lost in the countryside, and it’s okay to not know where you are going (not like in life where everyone expects you to have visions and goals and dreams for the future). Oh and one more: in acts of service, and volunteering. If’ I’m doing for others than I don’t have less time to despise myself, and it builds a false sense of intimacy with the community in which you are involved. (community requires sharing in my opinion).

  • nicely written comment jo. but are you being HONEST???? kidding!

  • ttm

    In the aisles of a Target store. In the bathtub. In stories. In my journal. In private jokes with my son or my friends. In my wildest dreams. And in God who is Master of Hide and Seek.

  • good ones all of you! now we know where to find you!

  • Julia

    I hide in the quiet, in being reserved, in the silence. They are secure places (probably strongholds – maybe even prisons at times) and completely controlled by me.

    Gee, I’m hesitating in hitting the button, wondering whether I will expose my secrets or not….

  • Fred

    We fool ourselves when we try to self-analyze. We can attempt to be purely honest, but we simply don’t have that ability. We end up navel-gazing and walking in circles.

    “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9

    Boy, how often we screw up when we try to “work on ourselves.” It simply doesn’t work.

  • Jacquelyn

    Does that mean you don’t have any hiding places, Fred?

  • Jacquelyn

    Sometimes the very places I get peace, contentment, encouragement… I also hide behind. Like my gardens, my beautiful children, the youth and young adults I mentor, reading this blog and making comments on this “virtual community” (lol). Can’t forget a biggy… eating – I definitely like to feed my pain – literally! Whenever I try to fast, I become painfully aware of how much I like to feed my pain.

  • I hide while being in plain sight… the doing sometimes is the best hiding place.

  • Fred

    Do I have any hiding places? I have tons. But I don’t have the ability to be honest about all of them.

  • Fred

    My “unhealthy hiding places” are the ones I use in public–stoicism, “humorous cynicism,” gregariousness, etc.

  • Chris

    mine are:
    in my MP3 headphones, a long run, the closest body of water, books, in plain sight(this work better than one might think), in Christ. to quote a song, hopefully He, “becomes clearer… as I disappear”.

  • I often hide in the bathroom, some of my best stinking, uh I mean thinking, happens in there.


  • I’m hiding now.

  • Fred

    I also hide in online forums and blogs that pose as such. I hide in the Ages of Empires (II and III) as well as the Age of Mythology. I love to hide in a Robert Sawyer novel. I would love to hide in the final Dune novel by Frank Herbert but he died before he wrote it. I like to hide in bed on Saturday mornings. I like to hide behind a guitar.

  • Ohhh . . . is it an INFP thing? That explains me . . . There. All you need to know.


  • Yeah, so my brother and I long ago realised that we have a “vulnerability act” that we hide behind in public. Only we still have it. I also hide in the blog, and in emails, and watching TV with my roommate.

  • Pam

    I love hiding in my gym that I attend.I release tension and I am able to revive a positive healthy attitude.
    I also hide in my husband sometimes:having none of my immediate family here really sucks at times, so it is with him that I can really be me..
    I hide in doing the dishes too(really wierd I know) but I totally relax and I feel content when I do the dishes..

  • well pam, in the interest of easing your pain, lisa and i have agreed that you can come over and do our dishes as many times as you need. least we can do.

  • Chris

    I have been trying out one of your hiding places recently, David. I broke out oil paint set my wife got me and let it flow…….. Now I’m freaked out! If someone paints their feelings and that shows through in the work than there is something hiding in me. It is showing something of a darker side of me that I have never seen. A little weird and disturbing but still me, hiding in me. Yet at the same time there is an unexplainable joy in working with the paint.(despite have no talent or training)

  • Julia

    What’s an INFP?

  • INFP is one of the 16 personality types determined by Kearsey-Bates’ Jungian personality-type tester. So, “I” stands for introvert, versus “E” for extrovert. “N” stands for intuitive versus “S” for sensing. “F” stands for feeling versus “T” for thinking. And “P” stands for perceiving versus “J” for judging. Google personality types and there’s lots there. I have a test if you are interested in doing it some time. Let me know.

  • I hide in being quiet, especially in public. I also hide behind my needles and a good ball of yarn.

  • Julia

    Actually, I did this with one of my classes not too long ago! Apparently my F stands for “forgetful”.

  • Jill

    I used to hide by being nice…………….^%&%$&$% that!

  • deb

    i just hide. hibernate. stay away. don’t answer the phone. i live far enough away from every one that i don’t have to worry about anyone dropping in. especially this time of year, which is when i tend to hide the most anyway.

  • Jacquelyn

    Jill – you are soooooo funny! I feel as if I know you.
    David – great post!

  • Speaking of hiding, check out question 2 here: