So Deep I May Drown

Comment on this post and I’ll enter your name in a draw to win my original watercolor painting, 4″x6″, called “Green Field Fence”. The contest ends Sunday night midnight Atlantic Time. I’m doing it differently this time: I’m not sending out a general email invitation to enter the contest. Whoever comments, comments. If you find this contest, go for it! Good luck!

Here goes: I’m not sure what’s going on with me. A friend of mine who has a prophetic gift (yes, I believe in this) called me the other day. He said, “You are heading into a time when you are going to be taken deeper. Very deep. The restrictions and boundaries that have been placed on your mind, heart and soul are going to be removed.” My experience in the past has been that times of going deeper have not been all that pleasant. Painful, in fact. So I feel a bit of fear and trepidation. I’m feeling at once sad and anticipatory. I’m trying not to be anxious, but trying to let this current take me. Lisa tried to encourage me this morning by reminding me that the accumulation of sorrow is probably contributing to my sadness, so take that into consideration. I know she’s right. But I am being pulled. I’m being pulled down. I do feel the restrictions and boundaries on my mind are being strained against, and that they are going to give. I hear the fence creaking. Last night, as I was going to sleep, I sensed the Spirit saying that I am going to have to finally, finally let go of my anthropomorphic ideas of God and even Jesus, because these are not them. We no longer know Christ according to the flesh. Also, all I want is community. That’s it. But the cultural and religious idea of what a church is pressures on us incredibly. If you fall into that trap, the teeth are deadly. I just don’t want to go there, which may mean certain failure as a church according to this world’s standards. I am on the brink of something terrible. May praise abound!