Notepad

Liechtenstein is the world's largest exporter of false teeth.

That's my new favorite fact. I've been having trouble figuring out how to ease it into conversation.

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"Stoned odyssey brings probation": the Delaware student who took a two-day, mushroom-induced pilgrimage to Connecticut driving other people's cars, has his day in court.

After explaining to the judge that Pemulis put DMZ on his toothbrush, or maybe it was "something I ate," the guy got two years of probation.

At The New Yorker, they wouldn't have allowed that headline. The word "odyssey" is only permitted in that publication to refer to a journey which ends again where it began, back home with Penelope and the dog.

The AP Stylebook is less pretentious, and allows the word to be used for "any extended wandering or journey."

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News you can use: How to get out red wine stains.

Can anybody vouch for this?

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Here's Wyatt Mason in the August Harper's, discussing Frank Miller at the end of his review essay "Flying Up and Flying Down: The rise and fall of the American superhero." It's nice to see Miller getting some high-brow props:

For 25 years, he has been drawing and writing the best superhero comics in the medium. His run on the comic Daredevil for three years beginning when he was 22 is the finest in that hero's 40-year life. His 450-page, two-volume Batman saga, Dark Knight, is satire, tragedy, romance and utopian treatise. His stories, most recently Sin City, are informed by the police procedural, and yet transcend their form. They are funny, without being flimsy.

His heroes do not "look real," but they feel human and, not infrequently, horribly inhumane. They are falling apart physically, are borderline psychotic, their psychoses produced by a commitment to morality in immoral times.

Miller is looking beyond the borders of the world of comics and is not reassured by what he sees. Nor is he trying to reassure us. His stories are not suitable for children. They entertain, illuminate, discomfort. They are comic books, in the best sense of the words. They are alive.

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Did you realize that Mark Dayton, D-Minn., is the most liberal senator?

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The George W. Bush Soundboard is quite fun. It's like the audio equivalent of refrigerator-magnet poetry. And the explosive way he says "Putin" just makes me laugh.

After playing with that a while, watch the Will Ferrell campaign ad. He doesn't really sound like Bush, but he talks exactly like him.

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The big news here in everyone's home town is the Trader Joe's that just opened in the renovated armory building on State Street. Here's hoping it doesn't hurt sales too much for the Selene Co-op up the street.

  • none

    Those Guardian people do some great travel articles. One of them, a very plucky London girl, lived in Pitcairn Island for 4 months, which has about 65 intermarried and intolerant people descended from the Bounty mutineers. She wrote a terrific book about the experience. The Polynesians left centuries ago and now the sad souls (all strict 7th Day Adventists) don’t want independence from Britain because they claim to have “no brains.” They’ve got sex scandal trials going there now too.
    This Lichtenstein story gives us lovers of the remote and peculiar new hope for the future. We are now in no danger of finding our wanderlust going in the direction of Pitcairn Island.
    They probably export more false teeth in direct proportion to the extremely small amount they would have occasionally imported. Life is easy in Lichtenstein and they have probably all kept their teeth into old age.

  • none

    I forgot that Ms. Birkett also said that not one adult Pitcairner has a single one of his own teeth left. I think it is more likely that their false teeth come from New Zealand, though, because they send somebody through once or twice a year.

  • carla

    In which case (Trader Joe’s) you should see this: http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2004/8/13wholefoods.html
    Also, you could always go to Essene, on South Street, if it’s still around . . .

  • taco cabana

    i love trader joes!
    viva la trader joes!

  • Lauren

    Patty’s red wine stain remover works wonders. I am especially inept at removing corks from wine bottles, and red wine bottles usually spray me with a fine mist. The peroxide-laundry soap mixture has saved many blouses.

  • Dennis Deveny

    Wine stain:
    Don’t bother with all that. Pick up the OxiClean. That’s what you need.
    My buddy was partying in the “wrong part” of Cinci, ran into one of his friends stumbling around, apparently drunk — turns out the dude had been stabbed! He was at a mini-mart and had been shanked due to mistaken identity. My buddy through him in the back seat of his new car, drove to the ER and helped him out. The upholstery was shot. Blood everywhere. Tried EVERYTHING. Saw the OxiClean TV ad, thought “shit, why not?” and it totally worked.
    Red wine ain’t got shit on blood.
    http://www.dennisdeveny.com

  • http://onegoodmove.org/1gm/1gmarchive/001465.html onegoodmove
  • Isaac Freeman

    That’s my new favorite fact.
    I favour “Twenty percent of road accidents in Sweden involve a moose”.

  • none

    a moose once married my sister…

  • http://onegoodmove.org/1gm/1gmarchive/001465.html onegoodmove

    Purple Heart

    The fact, unearthed here , that Liechtenstein is the world’s largest exporter of false teeth is probably less important than the news that George W. Bush has received three purple hearts for recent injuries in the war on terror. There was the boil sust…


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