NRA: Chaim is one of my Jewish characters

Nicolae: The Rise of Antichrist; pp. 143-146

So far in this series we’ve encountered two named characters who are Jewish.

We know they’re Jewish because of the names the authors gave them: Chaim Rosenzweig and Tsion Ben-Judah. And because the authors have both men speak in what they say is a “charming Hebrew-accented dialect.” And because the authors keep mentioning their Jewishness so aggressively that I’m reminded of that old anti-prejudice PSA from the 1970s:

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For those who can’t watch video or who are too young to recite this from memory, here’s a transcript:

BOY: Yesterday Jimmy said I was prejudiced.

GRANDPA: Do you know what prejudice is?

BOY: No.

GRANDPA: Well, prejudice is when you react to someone because of their religion or their culture.

BOY: But I don’t do that.

GRANDPA: Who is Jimmy?

BOY: Jimmy’s one of my Jewish friends.

GRANDPA: Then you are prejudiced, because you think of Jimmy as your Jewish friend and not your friend.

I think of that every time our story comes back to Chaim or Tsion in these pages, picturing Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins saying with that same earnest innocence, “Chaim Rosenzweig is one of my Jewish characters.”

We’ve met other characters in these books without being told anything about their religious or ethnic background. In another book, that might mean it was possible that those characters could be Jewish too, but in these pages it means we know they’re not. If Verna Zee were Jewish, she wouldn’t be named Verna Zee, she’d be Rachel Mount Sinai. If Spiky Alice were Jewish, she’d have a thick Yiddish accent and she’d be constantly identified as a “spiky-haired Jewess.”

And more to the point, if any of those other characters were Jewish, readers would know because the function of Jewish characters in these books is to walk around being Jewish. As with Chaim and Tsion, their ethnicity would be their character — or what they had in lieu of character.

Plus the authors only need two Jewish characters because they only need to illustrate the two possible outcomes for Jews in their End Times mythology. So we get Tsion Ben-Judah, the rabbi who repents of his Judaism and converts to fundamentalist Christianity, and Chaim Rosenzweig, the “nonreligious, nonpracticing Jew” who rejects Jesus and embraces the Antichrist. (Spoiler alert: Several books later, Rosenzweig also converts to Christianity.*)

LaHaye and Jenkins are vaguely aware that this dichotomy is problematic. It sounds like they’re suggesting that every Jewish person who doesn’t reject Judaism and convert to Christianity is in league with the Antichrist. And that is what they’re suggesting, but they take great pains to explain that many Jews, like Chaim, pledge their allegiance to Satan’s servant for “innocent” reasons:

The irony of all this was that the sweet-spirited and innocent Chaim Rosenzweig, who always seemed to have everyone else’s interests at heart, became an unabashed devotee of Nicolae Carpathia. The man whom Buck and his loved ones in the Tribulation Force had come to believe was the Antichrist himself played the gentle botanist like a violin. Carpathia included Rosenzweig in many visible diplomatic situations and even pretended Chaim was part of his elite inner circle. It was clear to everyone else that Rosenzweig was merely tolerated and humored. Carpathia did what he wanted. Still, Rosenzweig worshiped the man, once intimating to Buck that if anyone embodied the qualities of the long-sought Jewish Messiah, it was Nicolae himself.

See? The authors aren’t saying that Jews serve the devil because they’re evil. They’re saying that Jews serve the devil because they are befuddled and deceived. And surely the use of adjectives like “sweet-spirited and innocent” ought to shield the authors from any charges of anti-Semitism here.

That had been before one of Rosenzweig’s younger protégés, Rabbi Tsion Ben-Judah, had broadcast to the world the finds of his government-sanctioned quest for what Israel should look for in the Messiah.

Rabbi Ben-Judah, who had conducted a thorough study of ancient manuscripts, including the Old and New Testaments, had come to the conclusion that only Jesus Christ had fulfilled all the prophecies necessary to qualify for the role. …

Though Ben-Judah had been a student, protégé, and eventually a colleague of Dr. Rosenzweig, the latter still considered himself a nonreligious, nonpracticing Jew. In short, he did not agree with Ben-Judah’s conclusion about Jesus, but mostly it was simply something he didn’t want to talk about.

This is the other reason we know that Verna Zee can’t be Jewish: She isn’t friends with Chaim and Tsion. In these books, all the Jews know each other. Thus a rabbinical scholar was a “student, protégé, and … colleague” of a botanist. It doesn’t matter that these two scholars are in disparate disciplines, they’re both Jewish, and so of course they studied together.

That seems a bit absurd, but it actually helps to explain Ben-Judah’s idea of scholarship. Unable to find anything in his university library except for texts on botany, he was forced to conduct his “thorough study of ancient manuscripts” using only those texts available in the nightstand of every room at the local Holiday Inn.

This whole rehearsal of the history of Chaim and Tsion’s characters was prompted by Buck’s arrival in Jerusalem. According to Tim LaHaye’s End Times itinerary, Jerusalem ought to be the safest place on earth. It’s protected by divine intervention and by a treaty with the rest of the world that “prophecy” insists will be respected for three and a half years. But Buck didn’t flee to Jerusalem for a respite from the war zones he left in Chicago and New York, the authors sent him here with the idea that Jerusalem was an exotic locale for danger and derring-do.

Why is Jerusalem so dangerous? Well, the authors seem to think that Jews are Christ-killers who must now be out to kill the Christ-followers. The anti-Semitism here is nearly that explicit and palpable. This next bit gets pretty ugly.

Tsion Ben-Judah, Jenkins writes:

… had shocked the world, and especially his own nation, when he withheld the conclusion of his three-year study until a live international television broadcast. Once he had clearly stated his belief, he became a marked man.

… When Ben-Judah, with the cncouragement and support of the two strange, otherworldly preachers at the Wailing Wall, began sharing his message, first at Teddy Kollek Stadium and then in other similar venues around the world, everyone knew it was just a matter of time before he would suffer for it.

Buck knew that one reason Rabbi Tsion Ben-Judah was still alive was that any attempt on his life was treated by the two preachers, Moishe and Eli, as attempts on their own. Many had died mysterious and fiery deaths trying to attack those two. Most everyone knew that Ben-Judah was “their guy,” and thus he had so far eluded mortal harm.

Like I said, in these books, all the Jews know each other. So Tsion isn’t just best friends with Chaim Rosenzweig, he’s also best friends with Moses and Elijah.

Jenkins muffles the message a bit here with an evasive passive voice — “he became a marked man,” “he would suffer for it,” “he had so far eluded mortal harm.” He’s careful to avoid mentioning any explicit subject or actor. They are intent on killing Ben-Judah because he has become a Christian. But who are they?

Apparently, they are the Jews. This chapter doesn’t suggest that Jews all want to kill Christians. It simply assumes that to be the case — to be something so obvious it doesn’t need to be said. “Everyone knew.”

The authors here may not be explicitly promoting the ancient blood libel against Jews, but they’re certainly presuming it.

That safety seemed at an end now, and that was why Buck was in Israel. Buck was convinced that Carpathia himself was behind the horror and tragedy that had come to Ben-Judah’s family. News reports said black-hooded thugs pulled up to Ben-Judah’s home in the middle of a sunny afternoon when the teenagers had just returned from Hebrew school. Two armed guards were shot to death, and Mrs. Ben-Judah and her son and daughter were dragged out into the street, decapitated, and left in pools of their own blood.

We’ve already seen what Carpathia’s role in this was — ignoring Rosenzweig’s plea to protect Ben-Judah, but not actively targeting the converted rabbi himself. These “black-hooded thugs” were local — people from the former rabbi’s “own nation” who were enraged by his talk of Jesus and had declared him a “marked man” because of it.

The Rapture took away all the real, true Christians as well as every infant on the planet, making it impossible to produce a purer portrait of the blood libel here. The authors did not have any Christian infants available for their monstrous “thugs” to slaughter in this scene, so they had to make do with the closest available approximation — two teenagers who were recent converts to Christianity.

Explain to me again how Tim LaHaye is a “staunch friend of Israel”?

- – - – - – - – - – - -

* I got the sense that this was not the authors’ initial idea. I doubt the authors had worked out a detailed character arc for Rosenzweig, but it seemed to me that he was introduced in the early books as a representative intellectual/scientist type who was duped by the Antichrist and therefore was doomed to death and Hell. Over time, though, I think the authors grew too fond of him to abandon him to such a fate.

This is quite common among people like LaHaye and Jenkins who believe in a crowded Hell where they expect the majority of the human race to be tormented for eternity. Every little bit they balk at the idea — at least when it comes to specific people they know and like, even fictional ones.

I wish more of them would explore that emotional conflict and the underlying logical conflict. I wish they would examine why it is they think that God feels less love and mercy than they feel, or how it could be that God is less loving and less merciful than they feel themselves inclined to be.

Please don’t mistake this for a squishy or sentimental, “soft-hearted” objection to this idea of Hell. The problem isn’t that Team Hell isn’t sufficiently soft-hearted, but that they seem to be denying the divinity of Christ, which is usually regarded as kind of a big deal, heresy-wise, for us Christians.

The argument for Hell is that God demands blood, and thus, in this view, God’s only role at Calvary was to sit in judgment, awaiting the payment of the penalty God was due. From this view, the response to those Christians who balk at the idea of Hell for someone whom they’re fond of is to note that if God was willing to subject God’s only begotten son to such torment, then who are we to imagine that our friends or loved ones deserve anything else?

It seems to me that logic only works if we deny that God’s place at Calvary was on the cross. It only makes sense if we regard Jesus as a sinless sacrifice to God — the paschal lamb without blemish that God demands, but not God. If Jesus is God, though — if God commended God’s love toward us in that, while we were yet sinners, God died for us — then it seems like blasphemous ingratitude to imagine that our own merciful inclinations could exceed those of God. If we are reluctant to see Chaim Rosenzweig damned to eternal torment, then we ought to understand that God’s mercy and love exceeds our own, and that the God of Calvary would go — and has gone — to any length to save Chaim and all the others we care about, even unto death, even death on a cross.

In any case, I find it somewhat endearing that the authors couldn’t seem to bring themselves to condemn Chaim to the horrific fate that their theology insists must be in store for people like him.

Alas, such flickers of compassion are the exception and not the rule. The authors also seemed fond of poor Earl Halliday, but they still killed him off a couple of chapters ago and he’s now roasting for eternity in the fires of their Hell. But at least we have the case of Chaim Rosenzweig to show that the authors aren’t always as awful as they think they’re supposed to be.

 

  • http://lliira.dreamwidth.org/ Lliira

    Thanks :).

  • Thomas Keyton

    Snape’s instruction is better than fake!Moody’s “keep casting Imperio until Harry just becomes immune” technique, and Harry learned that pretty well. (Snape actually says it required similar skills, in fact… not that either teacher explains what these skills are short of protagonist status. Hogwarts just has low educational standards in general – I don’t think we see a single spell taught that isn’t taught as “words, wand movement, go”.)

  • SisterCoyote

    We may have to agree to disagree; maybe they’re just two different facets of the sect, but the church I grew up in had three or four pillars of whut that it revolved around, rather than just the Rapture. There was an emphasis placed on trying to bring more Jews into the faith that I remember being confusing even back then: “Well, you know, all souls are important to God, but… an Orthodox Jew converting, I mean, it’s pretty special.”

  • Consumer Unit 5012

    If they did, then there’s a risk they (or worse, the audience) might realize that God is the villain of the story.

  • Consumer Unit 5012

    Nobody cares, Eppie.

  • http://algol.wordpress.com/ SororAyin

    O bloody hell!

  • Foelhe

    “Now if Buck Williams could turn into an enormous rage-monster who basically can’t die, then the story might be a tad more interesting.”

    The Christian fundamentalist Gary Stu self-insert? “Turn into”?

  • http://heathencritique.wordpress.com/ Ruby_Tea

    And the hilarious part is, Mac and “Smitty” have the biggest bromance (a word I normally dislike) in the entire series. When they’re not “teasing” each other, they’re falling all other themselves to compliment each other. I’m sure Jenkins had no idea he was doing it, which makes it so much better.

  • Consumer Unit 5012

    “No, no, we’re all supposed to say the old king died of natural causes.”

    “Well, bein’ assassinated is natural for a king, right?”

  • Jamoche

    Or an Iain M Banks “barely recognizable as still human” world. But even then the odds are pretty badly against it.

  • Alix

    Interesting! I have to admit that’s not an attitude that I’ve ever personally observed.

    And you’ve just gently reminded me of something I try to keep in mind, and clearly sometimes fail to do so: that every group is always More Varied Than That.

  • Alix

    Sure. But I’d argue that seeing a deep meaning to every mention of race or skin color is also usually people reading into things. Someone being, say, black really shouldn’t be, in and of itself, something Significant, just another aspect to who they are.

  • Dash1

    Not at all–it’s the shoehorning of name into a slot that could have been prepared expressly for it that makes it funny. (Well, that’s one of the things that make it funny. Image of Rand Paul as Orthodox rabbi is now stuck in my head.)

  • Lori

    In Charlotte’s case that was more or less true. She was never presented as having any particular beliefs. She was by default whichever white bread religion she had been raised in (I can’t remember which one) and that’s about it. She started out wanting to convert so that she could marry Harry* and then found that Judaism resonated with her. She ended up being more religious than Harry, and her insistence on things like observing Shabbat was a source of mild consternation to him.

    *Harry wasn’t particularly religious, but for family reasons he felt like he couldn’t marry a non-Jew.

  • Persia

    Maybe only the underhanded types pose as a different ethnicity. I find it hard to believe they can compliment Hattie without insulting her in their eyes….

  • Alix

    Real humanization would be making the “evil” people not stupid, but giving them good reasons for making their choices/holding their beliefs.

    But that would require empathy, and it would run the risk of having your readers agree with them. And both are forbidden in Christian Literature(TM).

  • banancat

    I started re-reading Wheel of Time from the beginning, and realized that I had sort of fallen into this. I have realized that the people from Emond’s Field probably aren’t white as I had originally assumed. I don’t know if Robert Jordan ever intended them to have a race corresponding to the races in our world, but since reading the physical descriptions though the lens of examining my assumptions, I now view most of the characters from Emond’s field as looking more like people from south Asia.

  • Lorehead

    This update, or rather the piece of writing being criticized here, reminds me of wasting a bit of time arguing with a racist over Jason Richwine’s latest bit of Republican outreach to Latinos, and being told that my rhetorical style “is typical of” my Jewish ethnicity.

  • Hth

    Well, sort of. It actually isn’t totally clear how religious Charlotte was as a Christian (Episcopalian, btw), but you can argue that it was a real transition for her — she yells at him in frustration not long after her conversion that “I gave up CHRIST for you!” which I can’t see coming out of the mouth of someone who didn’t see that as an actual sacrifice. She’s also intensely keen on being the godmother to Miranda’s baby and quite hurt when Miranda chooses Carrie instead; she responds by telling Carrie *very insistently* that being a godparent is a *very important job.*

    I think that ritual and tradition are very important to Charlotte, and both her Christianity and her Jewishness were much more about that than about theology. However, not everyone is a theologian, and I think it’s one very reasonable way to be religious, that emphasis on practice over abstraction. Charlotte is an immensely practical lady in almost all ways, but I wouldn’t say that means that either of her religions were meaningless to her. (/ nerd)

  • Lectorel

    I’ve always read Harry through the lens of his abusive home life, and so his lack of curiosity, while frustrating, is not surprising. The first rule of surviving the Dursley’s was ‘Don’t ask questions.’ It’s not safe – at all – for him to seek answers in the Dursley house. It’s not safe to outperform his cousin. It’s not safe to seek help, or need care, or admit weakness.

    Harry’s always made sense to me, in part because his behavior mirrors some of my own unhealthy-but-needed coping mechanisms. He’s an abused kid, who keeps going back to an abusive environment. He’s not going to suddenly stop assuming that cruelty must be endure, adults cannot be relied upon, or that it’s unsafe to be remarkable.

  • Lorehead

    No, even there, he became what he became by conscious choice. Suffer really is something that other people did to him, although it’s not grammatically passive.

    But eluding people is something he actively did, and emphasizes his agency compared to an actual passive construction such as he was pursued would have, and much more an active one in which he’s the direct object, such as someone pursued him. That’s what I think Fred actually means: that L&J are evading whom he eluded and at whose hands he suffered.

  • Lorehead

    The short answer is, no, Israeli schools are not called “Hebrew school,” and that doesn’t distinguish the different types of school in Israel.

    Israel has four different public school systems. One is for Arabs, and the other three for Jews. Of those, one is secular and two are religious, and it seems likely a respected rabbi would have had his children in a religious school and moved them to a different school after his conversion. But, would a newly-minted RTC have sent his children to a secular state school, especially given the murderous feelings toward his family in the novel? Surely the religious schools run by Christians not Real and True survived the Event.

    Israel could have radically redesigned its school system after the miraculous deliverance, the apparent annexation of its neighbors, and the Event. Is there any indication that L&J ever thought of this? (Why would Jews for Jesus attend Hebrew school even in the U.S.?)

  • Lori

    Until Charlotte decides to convert for Harry I don’t recall her religious background/faith coming up much if at all, so I took her talk of giving up Christ as being mostly a story convenience/conflict driver/stand-in for other changes she feels she’s making for Harry. She says that to him in the middle of an argument driven by the fact that Harry won’t propose. I don’t think her deep love of Jesus was actually the issue there.

    I also thought the issue of who would be Brady’s godmother was about friendship issues and Charlotte’s mostly, but not entirely, unspoken disapproval of some of Carrie’s life choices far more than it was about deep religious feeling.

    I loved Charlotte most of the time, especially as the show went on. I don’t think her lack of profound Episcopalian-ness made her shallow and, as I said, Judaism resonated with her. She clearly got something from it quite apart from the issue of marrying Harry. I think the show made that point pretty clear when she kept going to synagogue even after he broke up with her. She wanted Harry back, but she wasn’t going to de-convert if that didn’t happen.

    I think the whole thing was just a fairly typical TV treatment of belief. It’s there when it’s needed to drive story and absent the rest of the time, which says nothing of importance about the characters and quite a lot about how TV works.

  • http://shiftercat.livejournal.com/ ShifterCat

    I hadn’t made the connection between “tribbing” and “tribade” — probably because the poster on UD sounds like he’d blink stupidly at you for using the latter term — but it makes sense.

  • http://shiftercat.livejournal.com/ ShifterCat

    Please bear in mind that the whitewashing only occurs in that execrable live-action version.

  • Alix

    I think Ben’s point was that yes, she’s black in the book, but there were some fans – heck, I ran into some, and I’m not in the fandom – who still managed to miss that and were outright offended to learn Rue was black.

  • Lori

    Good lord, really? The entire issue of the GOP “reaching out” to minorities is just made of FAIL on every level.

  • http://www.oliviareviews.com/ PepperjackCandy

    My impression is that most “races,” as we recognize them, disappeared centuries, if not millennia, ago. The only pure races left are the Aiel and the Sea Folk because both groups headed for the hills (or the ocean, in the case of the Sea Folk) and then kept to themselves genetically after that.

    As a result, I have always imagined that most of the characters are sort of olive-skinned, but not necessarily Asian or Latino or Middle Eastern specifically.

  • Lorehead
  • http://www.oliviareviews.com/ PepperjackCandy

    This discussion is actually making me have flashbacks to the “OMG! How dare J.K. Rowling make Blaise Zabini black?!? She did this just to spite the fanfic writers, didn’t she?” kerfuffle back when the movie of “Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince” came out.

  • Lori

    I literally made the gaping mouth fish face. Talk about saying the quiet thing loud. The GOP is now officially beyond the reach of parody.

  • EllieMurasaki

    I thought Ben’s point was about the M Night Shyamalan film. I’m pretty sure Hunger Games isn’t M Night Shyamalan.

  • http://twitter.com/FearlessSon FearlessSon

    I recall that Kenneth Branagh deliberately cast Idris Elba as Heimdall in Thor in part to throw a wrench into the way white supremacists tend to lionize Norse mythology by casting a black actor as a Norse god. It certainly put the Council of Conservative Citizens into a twist.

  • http://twitter.com/FearlessSon FearlessSon

    Reading Lovecraft, curiosity is often a character’s tragic flaw, leading them to learn awful truths about the universe that they are not prepared to cope with. Many of his protagonists are writing in first person with the intention of illustrating why we should not keep prying into things better left unknown, lest we come to the attention of powers far greater than ourselves.

  • Alix

    I think at this point I’m just ridiculously confused… XD

  • http://www.oliviareviews.com/ PepperjackCandy

    Ben made two comments. The first was about the white kids they cast as Katara and Sokka in the movie of “Avatar: The Last Airbender” and the other was about the kerfuffle that followed the revelation that the black girl in “The Hunger Games” was, indeed, black.

  • http://twitter.com/FearlessSon FearlessSon

    I remember a Latin American woman in Alan Dean Foster’s Catalyst who was named after a Russian opera. She said upfront that her parents had a poor imagination but a good radio.

  • EllieMurasaki

    For your education on the Shyamalan film The Last Airbender: all the actors are white, except those who play Fire Nation. Guess which side’s the enemy? In the original cartoon, some of the characters look white, but all the cultures are of color–Chinese, Japanese, Inuit, Tibetan, and at least a couple one-off characters are Korean. Inasmuch as such labels apply to a created world, but those are the places the cultural inspiration comes from.

    And if you didn’t need the education, somebody else probably does, so I’m posting it anyway.

  • Alix

    Ah, okay. Thank you.

  • Alix

    Yeah, I remember that, but it’s always good to have a refresher.

  • http://anonsam.wordpress.com/ AnonymousSam

    I am steadfast in my refusal to give out spoilers which indicate this might be relevant in some way!!11!eleven!

  • http://apocalypsereview.wordpress.com/ Invisible Neutrino

    Some people say the HBP book is probably the most open Take That book to fanfics. She has the equivalent of a songfic on two pages of HBP and then skewers it with a character groaning that it was a terrible song; she also tackles several motifs common to post-OotP fics, such as nearing at the reactivation of the DA, but it never comes into play as Harry says “Let’s wait and see”. JKR’s implicit in-universe compliment to Snape as an effective DADA teacher comes from the fact that the DA didn’t need to be reinstated until the Deathly Hallows.

    Some other things she tackles as almost deliberate ripostes are the uncaring-manipulative-Dumbledore and wealth-stealing-(insert character/s here) facets of such fics. Dumbledore takes the Dursleys to task, and explicitly indicates that Harry has received a sizable inheritance. On top of that he gives Harry special attention and instruction over the course of the school year. Oh, and such fics often involve Dumbledore naively insisting on resuming Occlumency lessons with Snape. In HBP Occlumency is basically a one-sentence sidestepping of the whole issue with Voldemort Occluding himself from Harry, which accomplishes the desired end result with no need for antagonism between Snape and Harry.

  • http://apocalypsereview.wordpress.com/ Invisible Neutrino

    Um, no. HG has Rue as a black person in the movie too.

    EDIT: Oh, my bad. You were complaining about The Last Failbender.

  • http://lliira.dreamwidth.org/ Lliira

    Well, in Lovecraft’s world, that makes sense. But Lovecraft’s world, while many find it interesting, is really nothing whatsoever like our own world, and so the human beings there are nothing like the human beings here. The rules are entirely different, and are no kind of guide to trying to write characters in anything but a Lovecraftian world — which is not just a horrific world, but a world in which the fact that someone is a so-called “negress” is supposed to legitimately send someone screaming for the hills.

  • http://apocalypsereview.wordpress.com/ Invisible Neutrino

    The main issue, as Dumbledore implicitly acknowledged, is that Snape used the Occlumency lessons as a bullying tactic.

  • http://apocalypsereview.wordpress.com/ Invisible Neutrino

    Indeed. That being said, when the narrative calls for it, oh boy, can Harry and his friends be damned curious for ten cats.

    That’s part of the issue, I think, with the HP books, JK Rowling needed to obscure certain things for narrative exposition and saving up for the Big Reveal, but in doing so created a main character in the Bildungsroman arc of the books who had to be narratively endowed with curiosity or incuriosity at the appropriate times.

    Consider the way he had access to a valuable store of personal connections to his parents through Hagrid ‘writing their old friends’ for pictures to assemble a collection for him, yet it falls to Remus Lupin to reach out to Harry first, and even then very little actual information about Harry’s parents as people and not simply abstractions in the narrative backdrop comes out in the books until Deathly Hallows/Pottermore/JKR interviews.

    A more crackerjack Harry would have started running down those names and written to them, gaining valuable knowledge about his parents. But for that to happen, the Big Reveal that Snape knew Lily and was obviously friends with her in his early years in school would have been blown far too early in the series and thus laid bare the true nature of Snape’s motivations. Keeping that a mystery was one of JKR’s objectives in the series and she did it well at the cost of making Harry’s behavior a little bit inconsistent.

  • http://apocalypsereview.wordpress.com/ Invisible Neutrino

    “Are you pout, Smitty?”

    “No, I am not pout, Mac.”

    *gigglesnorts*

  • http://twitter.com/FearlessSon FearlessSon

    Is it just me, or does the whole Millennial Kingdom sound like an extremely boring place to live? After a few years of having my mind go without stimulation I would probably risk damnation to just have something interesting to think about.

  • http://twitter.com/FearlessSon FearlessSon

    You know, Edward possibly killing Bella with his super-strong and over-enthusiastic sex, and the whole thing being a metaphor for abstinence one would think that the couple there could have safe sex.

    You know, get one of those steel bed frames with the built-in tie-down points, a couple pairs of hand and foot cuffs, Bella applies the restraints to Edward and rides him cowgirl. So restrained he could not hurt her, and thanks to his vampire body she could bounce on him until she tires.

    Sure, unprotected sex can be dangerous, but sex with appropriate precautions can be fun for the whole couple!*

    … somehow I do not think that is the message the author wanted us to take.

    *Or more, depending on your interests and the mutual interests of those you hook up with.

  • http://www.facebook.com/shaenon Shaenon K. Garrity

    Ming, Toy, Chang, and Wong are all surnames. Technically they could be used as personal names, but I don’t think it’s very likely.

    Out of both those lists, “Marc Feinberg” is the only one that sounds like a name that belongs to a human.


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