The Witch’s Guide to Etiquette: Avoiding Witch Wars

witchetiquetteThe following are 8 guidelines to effective Witchcraft and working with any community in an intelligent capacity.  And keeping your broom clear of the dramallama.

“Your word is your worth.” 

We work with a lot of seemingly intangible things – spirits, deities, magick, and metaphysics.  But as we know they are real from our own experiences, consider what you say and what you write as also being real.  Be true to your word. If you cannot keep a promise or keep to your word, don’t lie. Avoid appeasing and making empty commitments. It’s better to be upfront and disappoint at the get-go, than to build up deception over time.

“Don’t piss on the seedlings – they become trees.”
Value everyone you come across and treat them with respect – whether you know who they are or not.  Often, amazing power can come from the most unassuming of packages.  Assuming someone is a weed or uninformed or inexperienced because you’re not familiar with them or they seem unequal to you, will only get you into trouble.

“Speaking of trees, they all can be felled.”
No one is too tall, too mighty, too strong, too powerful, or impervious.  There are always storms, forest fires, disease can come in many forms, and the ground underneath the tree may erode away.  Translation: no one is greater or better than anyone else, and even the smallest thing can cause something big to crash down.

“The same plant can heal or harm depending upon how you interact with it.”
Nothing is entirely “good” or “evil.” Some incredibly helpful plants are invasive – others have poisonous blooms but tasty roots. Some prickly plants provide homes for endangered birds.  Keep this same wisdom in mind for people.  I am friends with a great variety of people, and some of those friends do not get along with other friends.  I hear and acknowledge the differences of opinions and problems, but I also recognize the strengths and good attributes too.  Just because someone disagrees with you on one topic, doesn’t make them evil – likewise for the inverse.  It’s far safer to understand nuances than to decree that everything must be absolute.

“Don’t poison the cauldron.”
We’re all interconnected, and even more so in marginal communities.  We have far more in common then we are different.  If you purposefully pour poison into the well you drink from, eventually you will feel the effects.

“What’s good for the goose is what’s good for the goose.” 
When someone states, “this is how I do things” or “this is how it works for me” – that’s exactly what they are saying.  They are not saying your way is wrong or invalid – unless they are saying precisely that as well. (like: “This is the way that works, and your way sucks/is wrong.”)  It’s natural to compare and contrast, but don’t set up competition or drama where it doesn’t exist. You’re not sure what someone means? Ask them to clarify, politely.  Don’t read into something that’s not there.

“Follow the intent.”
Similarly, watch your baggage.  If someone verbally missteps with a word or a phrase, take a moment to consider what are they trying to say.  Rather than immediately jumping to the defensive/offensive/being triggered, take a moment to reflect.  Do they mean well? Is there a better way to address it? Is it the time or place for a teaching moment? (This one is courtesy of Anaar.)

“Where threefold counts.”
Witches absorb, think, then act.  My rule of three is: read everything three times before choosing a course of action/response/commenting.  Similarly, I read my response three times before entering/sending.  It gives you time to absorb, make sure you understand what you’re reading, and eliminates most confusing or reactionary elements.  Also allows you to beat the sinister demon of the internet: Autocorrect.

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