Some might remember reading Shana Buck’s moving piece last month, where she wondered about the conceptual perceptions of her son who is autistic.
Last weeks news that the certain “studies” linking autism to vaccines were fraudulent finds Shana pondering what parents are supposed to do, and who they should trust:
Something is causing the rise in actual numbers of autistic children, something besides ‘better diagnosis’. What should I, as the mother of one child with autism and another with Asperger’s syndrome (a disorder in the ‘autism spectrum’) think about this minefield of opinion that has opened up since this news?
There is a kind of pain that happens deep in the heart when a child begins to display the symptoms of autism and denial is no longer possible. It becomes a deep grief when the diagnosis is made.
Guilt follows: Was it my own fault in what I have done, or in what I have failed to do that led my son to become mentally retarded, to be unable to process the world around him appropriately, to be so dependent on others for his care for all of his life? I treasure my son, and love him beyond measure, yet the nagging doubt came: What did I do, how could I have prevented this, what will happen to him when I’m gone?
The voices of doctors, scientists, advocates, and media shouting each other down over the heads of people like us is sometimes too much to bear. Who can be trusted?
It’s a mother’s plea for straight information and no-more hyperbole. Check it out.