The Brother printer, customer service and the church

Bissell vs Brother

Customer service at its worst. Endless correspondence, multiple useless fixes, and a relatively new, what should be long-lasting workhorse black and white Brother laser printer is now destined for the trash heap–or where ever I can take a piece of broken electronics where its burying place will not further pollute the environment.

Contrast this experience with one I had recently with Bissell. About two years ago, we had purchased a lightweight, battery operated vacuum from them. We rarely used it, but when we needed it, we appreciated it and liked the way it functioned.

A couple of months ago, just when we did need it, the battery would not hold a charge. I contacted their service department and tried the fix they offered. It didn’t solve the problem. A week later, I had a brand new vacuum delivered to my house at absolutely no cost. That’s customer service.

Waterpiks and Restaurants

Last summer, we bought a Waterpik from Costco. The package included small travel appliance. It quit working on a recent trip. Costco took the entire apparatus back and refunded our money. We then bought a new one. No cost to us.

A couple of weeks ago, we had a terrible experience at a downtown Dallas restaurant. We made a reservation and had allotted a generous hour and fifteen minutes for our meal. We had tickets for a downtown concert and knew we needed to leave at 7 pm.

We arrived on time and explained our time constrictions to the waiter. Twenty minutes later, we still had not even been served water. When the drinks finally came, 35 minutes after our arrival, mine arrived in a dirty, sticky glass. I requested a clean glass and a washcloth to clean my hands. Twenty minutes before our departure time, we asked the water about our food. “Two minutes,” he responded.

Two minutes indeed! Two minutes before we were due to leave, we still had no food. We got up and walked to the reception area. The greeter called for a manager when we requested our coats and explained why we would not return.

He comped the drinks.  He also offered to package the food which was finally ready. We declined.

We went to get our car, already a few minutes behind schedule. The valet parking was an utter disaster with multiple cars caught in gridlock. We did, however, manage to get to the concert on time, albeit with empty stomachs.

I wrote to the restaurant the next day explaining what had happened. We are tolerant people and know stuff goes wrong. I wrote with kindness and in a way to suggest that they correct the multiple issues before others had similar experiences.

The next day, the general manager contacted both my husband and me. She offered a sincere apology and a free dinner. We have not changed our mind about returning to this particular restaurant. There are plenty of other restaurants to try. Nonetheless, I appreciated the response and they deserve credit. Thus, I choose not to disclose the name of the restaurant.

Stuff will always go wrong

To get back to the Brother printer: I am naming it and suggest that you don’t buy one. They continue to send me emails but have no intention of making this situation right.

Just as in restaurants, there are plenty of other better options for printers.

The response from Bissel and Costco, however, blow me away. Their customers matter to them.

The truth: stuff goes wrong. Things break. Items don’t always run as advertised. Restaurants hit the perfect storm of being short-staffed and overly booked. Apologies and efforts to make things go right hit home runs with customers.

What about the church?

Now I find myself wondering about the church and our “customers.” I define customers as those who are either first-time guests or repeat guests who are actively looking for a church, a place to plug in, to settle their families, to move to deeper discipleship.

Last year, my husband and I visited a fairly nearby United Methodist Church. I had just come off a year of being a “Mystery Worshipper,” attending a different church each week and writing about it. We had also recently married and were looking for a place where a born and bred Roman Catholic and a retired United Methodist clergywoman could attend with regularity.

The quality of the messages and the liturgy of Holy Communion matter to both of us. Messages don’t necessarily have to be deep. We do not need to be “fed” as we are both mature in our faith and able to handle that task ourselves. But we do have expectations that our time, and the time of other worshippers, will be honored as important. We also expect that there will be a well-grounded understanding of the theology of the sacraments and intentional focus on God.

On this particular day, it was clear that the preacher was unprepared. Totally. This person interminably meandered down personal memories and family stories, leaving time only for an abbreviated “Come and get a snack” type of communion.

Afterward, upset about what I had just experienced, I posted my frustration on a Facebook clergy board, careful not to identify either person or place. The response to my post totally shocked me: multiple defenses of unprepared pastors.

From what I gathered, it is a relatively common practice for clergy to have “off days” (that was the most common excuse) and to feel no remorse or concern about not doing their jobs and wasting their parishioners’ time.

Yet we wonder why the church is dying. Frankly, there are a lot of other options out there on Sundays, just as there are plenty of restaurant choices and printer options.

What is our job?

As clergy, we have a job: we are to master the art of homiletics, of bringing to life the Word of God for the people of God so that those very people may go out and be the hands and feet of Jesus. It is only in this way that the world will experience and see the hope of grace and reconciliation with God and with each other.

To be lazy with our preparation, both on scholarly and spiritual levels, means we defraud the people who have gathered together as the Scriptures command. It’s just wrong.

Yes, stuff goes wrong. Time pressures, unexpected funerals, personal crises, annual reports, and the never-ending facility issues can eat up clergy time. But they go with the job–and there is no reason that message planning should not be done well in advance. People rightly have certain expectations of worship, just as we have certain expectations of appliances we buy and restaurants where we dine.

There is one thing the church does that no other entity can do: communal worship of a Holy God. Other organizations can provide opportunities for community service, for making friends, for educating children in morals and ethics, and even for Bible study.

But worship is our cornerstone and our uniqueness. We can and should offer to all an opportunity for focus on the Holy Other, to receive the blessing of an intentional time set aside to concentrate on things beyond the daily challenges of life.

Let’s be Bissells, not Brothers, in what we offer the community. Size is totally irrelevant here. True worship is not dependent on place, on professional music or projected graphics. It is dependent on the people doing the work, the liturgy, together, guided by the clergy.

That is our job.