The other day I was talking to my husband about how if Anthony were alive at that very moment, this would be my best life. Everything in that moment was perfect. The problem is that because Anthony is dead, we will never have a chance at perfect happiness in this world ever again. I don’t think we ever did have a chance at that on this side of heaven, but I never realized that until now that it is… Read more

  I was pro-choice before becoming Catholic even though I would have said that I was “personally against abortion, but didn’t feel I had the right to tell anyone what to do with their body” and not that I was pro-choice. But when friends would come to me about their unplanned pregnancies, I would always tell them about Anthony and how being his mother was the best thing that ever happened to me so if I could do it, then… Read more

The definition of Exhortation is “communication encouraging someone to do something.” Keep this in mind as I tell you exactly how Pope Francis’ new exhortation titled “Gaudete et exsultate”   has wrecked me. The title is translated into “Rejoice and be Glad” and what it is encouraging us to do is to become holy. Pope Francis explains what holiness is and that it is something that we can all be. He goes on to lay out what holiness is, how to attain… Read more

  On Good Friday I went to Stations of the Cross at my parish. It is the yearly Holy Week thing that I make it to. This year I wanted to make sure and sit at the Fourth Station, which is the station where Jesus meets His mother Mary. I got flustered as I walked into the Church with my granddaughter who wanted to sit with her Godmother so I couldn’t find the Fourth Station, so I just picked a… Read more

This morning I woke up to the news that a little boy who has been gravely ill might not make it. His family is preparing for the worst news today and they have been praying for a miracle all week long. On this week. Holy Week. They have been surrounded with prayer and have had prayer requests made all over social media and yet the reality is that they could have the worst day of their lives today. All those… Read more

  Earlier this week I considered writing up something about how to grieve during Holy Week. It seemed like a good idea because I wanted to be able to reach people who are facing their first Holy Week since the loss of a loved one, but then I realized that I have no clue at all on how to do it. There isn’t a list of things that make this easy. The only thing that got me through my first… Read more

Right now, I am sitting at the 1-year mark of the day between my birthday last year when I signed and paid for my son’s funeral and the 1-year mark of his funeral. A year ago, I was in absolute shock. I read my updates on Facebook from a year ago and I don’t even recognize myself. I see a woman whose life has just blown up and she is talking about needing cleaning supplies. I do not even understand… Read more

  The other evening my husband and I were driving to the grocery store as the sun began to go down. It is March in Central Texas which means that the evenings are cool and the sun goes down slowly painting the sky with beautiful colors. It also goes down at a decent time, not at 4 in the afternoon like in the fall. This is the time of year where you can see Texans coming out of their houses… Read more

As many of you who are regular readers of mine know, March 8th will be the one year anniversary of my oldest son Anthony’s suicide. I would be lying if I said that I am not feeling the anniversary lingering over my days and weeks ahead of it. I am trying to stay busy, but that only works for so long before the fact that my child is gone and buried in a cemetery hits me like a brick to… Read more

  A few weeks ago I was thinking about how I was going to keep myself busy for the next few months as my family and I head into the first anniversary of my oldest son’s suicide. I knew it was going to be very difficult as well as an emotional roller coaster. I was not wrong. Yesterday was Ash Wednesday and I began to fall apart. But my plan to stay busy with something was a good one because… Read more

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