How Clean ARE You?

The Washlet.  Does it creep you out?  And seriously, how many euphemisms can you use to avoid saying, “This thing shoots hot water up your ass, then dries you.”?

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  • Keith

    It’s not so much the product that creeps me out. Well, a little, but maybe the idea just takes some getting used to? I imagine if we all grew up using something like this, the idea of sticking your hand down there with a little paper to wipe around would be a creepy, too. But it’s the people. They’re just too happy about all this, somehow. They’re like my new, clean, wholesome well-adjusted friends. And I don’t think they creep me out *just* because I’m introduced to their bottoms before I meet their faces.

  • Keith

    This thing shoots hot water up your ass, then dries you
    Stop lying about the Washlet! Isn’t that just the way? As soon as someone finds the key to happiness, everyone has to lie & cut it down. But if you click on the nice, happy lady who’s in charge of answering specific questions (on the far right), and click on the appropriate question, you will learn the truth that the water is “not hot — more like warm. And it’s fully adjustable to just the way you like it, from comfy to toasty.” Many of the other worries one might have — like the seat being too hot, fouled water falling back onto the cleansing wand, etc. — are also addressed there. Please, let’s give this a chance. I mean, think about it. What if it really is the secret to being cleaner, and happier, every single day?

  • It’s a happier… and a hands-free clean. Leaving your hands free for the crossword puzzles and shadow puppets. The sincerity with which they make their points is really quite creepy!

  • Shawn

    Wow. I can’t even look at that thing …

  • Dana Ames

    Same principle as the bidet in Europe, but as a toilet add-on. (except the Euro bidets don’t have auto dry or heated seat…) Tony, I thought you were a bit more cosmopolitan than that 🙂
    The stress on “Happiness” is a bit much, must say.
    As soon as I get my taxes done I will email you my thoughts on the book. Sorry it took so long.

  • Larry

    If you’re at work, its probably best not to click on the link provided ….

  • cp

    I always wonder if the models in ads like this bank more bucks than the average ad pays, considering the public humiliation factor.

  • Clean, really clean, is a beautiful thing… bring it on.

  • Jack

    What creeps out bidet (water) users is people who only use paper. Nothing nice about skid marks and foul odor. Water is the only way to clean. As we already know.

  • Theresa Seeber

    Somehow we are avoiding the aspect of splashing during spritzing and how horrendously that might go? Okay, well, I guess I won’t bring it up either. Maybe it doesn’t happen. I have never used anything like this thing! ROFL

  • Mike

    Yeah… a warning about the work appropriateness of that link would have been MUCH appreciated.

  • Apparently I’m the only one who left the website wondering if it was serious or a clever joke…PLEASE.