Do You Know the Parent of an LGBT Kid?

If so, my good friend Andy Marin needs your help:

Over the years The Marin Foundation has received numerous requests for help, guidance, and advice from the parents and families of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender (LGBT) and questioning children. Many of these parents identify as Christian and are struggling to reconcile their faith and the sexuality of their child. Although many resources exist for the parents and families of LGBT children, few of these resources offer a framework for exploring this issue from a loving Christ-like perspective. Therefore, the Marin Foundation is launching a Parent Resource Initiative to identify the needs of Christian parents of LGBT children and develop resources to help them through the experience of their child’s coming out.

WE NEED YOUR HELP!!! If you are a parent of a LGBT child, a family therapist, or a parent support group leader, we need your help. In the next couple of months, our goal is to interview and survey two hundred or more Christian parents of LGBT children as well as others involved in supporting families.  We want to hear your story!

We are looking for a representative sample of parents from all over the United States, of all ages, ethnicities and ranges of Christian beliefs. Whether your child came out to you two days ago or twenty years ago, we would love to hear about your experience.

via Calling All Parents.

  • http://peaceablekindom.blogspot.com katie m ladd

    I recommend that they speak with RMN Parents. Reconciling Ministries Network is a group of United Methodists who advocate for full inclusion of LGBTQI people within the life of the church as well as in broader society. There is a subgroup of RMN for parents of LGBTQI folk. Here’s their link: http://www.rmnetwork.org/get-connected/extension-ministries/prn/
    I can set them up with specific parents if that would be helpful.

    Peace
    Katie M Ladd
    Seattle

  • Jeff Straka

    This comment from Marin’s post (that you linked to) says it quite well:
    “As the very proud Christian mother of a Christian gay son, I was going to volunteer to help. I am already a resource for parents on gaychristian.net. And then I came to the phrase celebrating Billy Graham. How could you? How could you? He denigrated all that my child is, encouraged NC to continue to treat him all LGBT as second class citizens. I have heard Andrew speak and while I appreciated the whole bridge building,there comes a time when enough is enough! Jesus did not mince words when he spoke of the hypocrisy of the Pharisees, calling them vipers and whited sepulchres. It is time for Christian straight allies to quit being so namby pamby nice and take a stand for what is right and righteous and fair.God loves my son and the entire LGBT community no less than He loves me and they are just as worthy of total inclusion in the church.”

    • http://existentialpunk.com Existential Punk

      i REALLY resonated with what she said here:

      ‘while I appreciated the whole bridge building,there comes a time when enough is enough! Jesus did not mince words when he spoke of the hypocrisy of the Pharisees, calling them vipers and whited sepulchres. It is time for Christian straight allies to quit being so namby pamby nice and take a stand for what is right and righteous and fair.’

      i find that THIS is not the time anymore to NOT take a stand on whether being queer is a sin or not. Lives and humanity are at stake. This whole love the sinner hate the sin crap is so offensive. BY NOT taking a stand, imho, one is not recognizing the humanity of a queer person. TOO many queers sit in the closet, hating themselves, believing G-D hates them, and attempt and often succeed in suicide. LIVES are at stake people! This whole idea of LOVE that Marin preaches to his groups is NOT complete if people are being led to NOT accept the entirety of a person. He says he isn’t worried about whether it is a sin or not because the point is to love. i think that is offensive as a queer person. LOVE is important BUT also recognizing that i am NOT in sin for being who G-D created me to be is JUST as important. i really have no more patience for people who cannot take a stand. At least with the homophobes and haters i know where i stand!

      Rant over!

      • Jeff Straka

        Marin and his self-aggrandizing organization CONTINUES to proudly live by this hurtful “motto” (from his post linked by Tony): The Marin Foundation believes, as Billy Graham once stated, “It’s the Holy Spirit’s job to convict, God’s job to judge, and it’s my job to love”.
        What exactly is the Holy Spirit “convicting” the gay person of, and what exactly is God “judging” him or her on? Duh. I think this quote speaks to Marin’s “bridge building” scam quite well:
        “Sometimes burning bridges isn’t a bad thing…It prevents you from going back to a place you should never have been to begin with.”

        For Tony Jones, who claims to be fully inclusive, to promote this guy is very disappointing.

      • Frank

        This real problem is when people claim their identity is in their sexual expression. There misplaced identity is what causes them to hate themselves. So anyone who affirms sinful behavior is directly complicit in the results of that sinful behavior or identity crisis.

        Sin is sin and we do no one any favors by avoiding calling a sin a sin. Homosexual behavior is a sin as stated in the bible. No one has scripturally demonstrated how we cold come t,o any different conclusion.

        • http://existentialpunk.com Existential Punk

          Oh, Frank, i am SO sick of people like you. YOU have NO idea what it is like to be gay. It is a HUGE part of my identity though not all of it. You have NO idea what it is like to hate yourself because you are told you are going to hell or G-D hates you for being gay. There is NOTHING wrong with being gay. G-D created me this way, loves me and embraces me. G-D EVEN celebrates me. Take your closed-mindedness somewhere else. Oh, and maybe actually spend some time getting to know a gay person for who they are without some sort of agenda.

          • Frank

            Actually I know more than you think. I am sorry you have ever hated yourself. You should not because God loves you dearly.

            We all sin. That being said, homosexual behavior is a sin according to the bible. God does not make anyone gay, sin does. God does not celebrate sin he mourns over it. We should mourn over it to.

          • Basil

            Don’t feed the trolls, especially the homophobic ones. He’s probably closeted. Just ignore him.

  • http://sabbathjourney.typepad.com/ Terry Chapman

    I would be happy to participate.

  • Blake
    • http://existentialpunk.com Existential Punk

      Right on Blake!

  • http://gracerules.wordpress.com/ Liz

    I vowed quite a while back that as long as Marin’s organization refused to make the statement that they did not condemn healthy same sex relationships that I would not support him. Like Jeff, Adele and others here have said … Marin and his organization’s stance is insulting to lgbt people and I would go so far as to say that I believe that not taking a stand is an unjust act and that it feeds a system that is harmful and dangerous to lgbt people. Sure some good comes out of Marin’s organization but that does not mean that not taking a stand is right or good or doesn’t cause harm. There are other Christian organizations that support lgbt people, lgbt youth and parents of lgbt that courageously affirm that they do not condemn same sex relationships and don’t believe it is a sin to be gay. If you agree that same sex relationships are not sinful then I urge you to support an organization that is openly affirming rather than one like Marin’s.

    • Frank

      There is no such thing as a healthy sinful relationship.

      • http://existentialpunk.com Existential Punk

        Frank, THAT is your opinion and how you choose to interpret the Bible. There are other Christians who see/interpret/experience differently than you do. HOW do you know YOUR way of seeing/knowing G-D and the Bible is correct? Gotta look at the historical and cultural contexts of Scripture. i am NOT out to change your mind as you will never do it. So, do not try and change mine. G-D made me gay, celebrates me being gay, and is happy for me!

        My marriage to my wife is a beautiful and healthy thing. We have our ups and downs as ANY couple.

        The Bible, imho, was referring to temple sex, idolatry, and a code for the Jews. Do you eat shrimp and wear mixed fiber clothing, Frank? People all over the place do. SO, are you going to condemn them as well? What about stoning to death an adulterer and gay people? Do you condone that?

        • Frank

          Please show us where God condones and/or blesses homosexual behavior in any form. I am open to seeing your scriptural evidence for your position.

          EP its not surprising that many people just do not know the answers to your questions but they exist. It is a symptom of biblical illiteracy.

          You can find some of you answers here: http://redeemer.com/news_and_events/newsletter/?aid=363

          • http://existentialpunk.com Existential Punk

            I see you ignore my points about stoning people to death for their sins.

            Like i said, the OT were ritual cleansing laws for the Jews. In the NT, Paul was speaking to temple prostituition, which many STRAIGHT men were known to frequent and have sex with boys. That was their culture.

            Read anything by Mel White or the book, “What The Bible Really Says About Homosexuality”.

            Homosexual is a modern construct and was added to the bible translations in the early 1900′s.

          • Frank

            I am so sorry you have bought into the lies, misdirection and bad interpretations that have no compelling scriptural backing. Your assertions have been so thoroughly debunked its surprising that anyone can continue to say those things without being intellectually and theologically embarrassed.

            Of course I do not condone stoning anyone. Jesus changed that when He basically said only stone someone if you are sinless. Murder is a sin in any form.

            And besides people who proudly live in sin are stoning their own lives, both earthly and heavenly. They don’t need any outside assistance.

          • Jeff Straka

            Frank – God didn’t write the Bible (or the Qur’an). MEN did. Sorry you bought into the misdirected idea that he did. This is a BIG part of the problem with religion.

          • Frank

            Jeff if you choose to dismiss scripture than there is not much I can do. Good luck with that belief.

          • Jeff Straka

            Oh, I don’t “dismiss” the scripture at all, Frank. I can appreciate and learn from the stories of struggles mankind has had trying to grasp the un-graspable. I LOVE the sayings/teachings of Jesus (especially in the Gospel of Thomas). I think Jesus is DEAD-ON in his understanding of God and the Cosmos and how we are connected to it. I think Jesus was DEAD-ON in his reformation of the Torah and the Levitical Code, saying that it is NOT about rituals and purity codes, but it is about love and mercy and kindness and justice to our neighbor (and all creation). Too bad you don’t take Jesus at his word…

  • Frank

    Actually I do Jeff! Jesus was a practicing Jew and would have agreed with everything in the OT. He also affirmed marriage as a man and a woman. Why don’t you take Him at His word?

  • http://existentialpunk.com Existential Punk

    Frank, i laugh at your narrow-mindedness and your absolute certainty. It is rather sad to me.

    i have not bought into any lies. i am at peace with G-D and know i am fearfully and wonderfully made as a queer woman. You cannot/won’t see that, but i am NOT dependent upon you.

    • Frank

      And therein lies your problem EP. Good luck with that.

    • Jeff Straka

      Amen, EP! God loves you and so do I!!!

      • http://existentialpunk.com Existential Punk

        THANKS so much, Jeff! Love you too!

  • Jeff Straka

    Funny, Frank, how I read about Jesus breaking Levitical purity/ritual codes left and right – ANY that were NOT about justice, mercy, love, and kindness. Frank, you are a douche bag and there is simply no point in arguing with one any longer. Good luck with your pitiful, isolated, country-club church-life.

    • Frank

      And finally the last resort of an untenable position… name calling. Well done!

      • Jeff Straka

        Well, Franky, when you tell someone that God “mourns” over who they are and that they, too, ought to “mourn”, I don’t consider that to be a polite, uplifting use of words. It’s that very attitude that causes teen suicide, asshole.

        • Frank

          Jeff you do need to read more carefully and thoughtfully. I said that the main problem is when we make our sexual preferences our identity. That’s why these kids feel they way they do because they are being told they “are who the are”, “there is nor reason to change”. “God made you that way”. In other words they are being lied to which confuses them and keeps them stuck and hopeless.

          Those that lie to them are the ones who are contribute to their depressed feelings and low self-esteem. Kids deserve Godly support not worldly platitudes.

          That all being said we all need to do a better job to be present in kids lives and love them and protect them. Parents, friends and churches should stand with them more and make sure they know they are loved and tell them the truth that their identity is not in their sexual preference. Yes they have sin in their lives, we all do, but once we admit that we are saved by God’s grace and with God we can be transformed. Even our sexual feelings can be transformed. That’s how big our God is.

  • Jeff Straka

    Maybe God can transform your bigoted brain, Frank. Over and out.