I went to bed at 7 PM and woke up in the middle of the night to my phone dinging with messages. A couple needed appointment reminders. Another sent me a cute meme. Another asked me on a lunch date. But out of a couple dozens there was one that stood out.
Kristy – you used to be positive and that’s why I followed you, but you are a miserable person now and you should probably kill yourself.
I clicked the profile and found they weren’t a friend and I didn’t recognize the name as a client. It was a middle aged lady. Her photos showed her holding her grandkids and a couple with her very cute dog. There was a picture of her with her husband on a boat, both laughing and drinking a bottle of beer. Another in front of the castle at Disney World. She looked like a nice person. But this person just told me to die.
After that I couldn’t sleep. I went through my statuses and some of them showed stress. As a woman, a mom, a daughter, a business owner, etc. we seem to hold more than normal and 2018 and 2019 have challenged me to see how much my soul arms could hold. It ends up I can hold a whole lot most of the time. I didn’t feel miserable and I sure hoped that I wasn’t making others miserable – so miserable that I should exit this world so not to spew any negative energy into this earthly plane. But that’s what she thought I should do. I’m an empath, sensitive with my heart on my sleeve, but I’m not fragile – thankfully. Because what if I was? Or what if she told someone who was? I can’t imagine. No, I don’t want to.
So I apologize if I’ve come across as negative and lost my positive mojo for a bit. I think we all go through ups and we go through our downs – not everyone is being judged publicly and I guess I put myself out there to do just that. Yesterday I played in the garden and sent warm thoughts to the stranger who thought I’d be better off dead. I felt better and I hope she did too.
Grounding is an amazing tool for ridding yourself of the energy sludge. Self-care, easy to say and so hard to do sometimes.
Ways to Ground Yourself – Drink hot drinks. Gardening. Write a letter to someone you are upset with or that you are missing, and then burn it. Hug a tree (really). Eat a salad. Take a hot bath with Epsom salts. Exercise. Smudge yourself. Diffuse some essential oils (orange, lemon, or rosemary can help brighten your day).
We are constantly being challenged and tested. I’m a work in progress too.
Wishing you a magical weekend.