3 Ways Porn Hurts the Heart of Your Wife

3 Ways Porn Hurts the Heart of Your Wife February 5, 2018

In more than a dozen years of research about how guys privately think about things like sex and porn use, I’ve seen a striking pattern.

While nearly all men are visually tempted today, and many hate and struggle against the temptation, most of those same men also think their porn use has nothing to do with their wives. They may feel awful about it, but they really don’t understand why their wives would. As one man summarized, “Sometimes I deal with it great. Other times, not so much. But my wife knows I love her, right? She knows that if I look at porn it says nothing about my love for her.”

Guys, I’m here to tell you why you’re wrong. And please know I’m not trying to heap guilt or shame onto the heavy load you’re already carrying. Honestly, given my research with thousands of men for For Women Only and, more recently, Through a Man’s Eyes, I actually have immense compassion for your struggles in today’s culture. But I’m here as a woman – and as a researcher – to help you understand the truth of what your wife has probably been telling you: your porn use really does make her feel terrible.

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