Reason #2: Teens Lose Respect For Parents Who Give Up On Rules To “Be A Friend”
A second reason to hold the reins of authority with your teen: if parents don’t take charge, your teen will lose respect for you and discount your authority. Ouch. Remember that hit movie, Mean Girls? Amy Poehler plays the mom who tries to be the super-trendy BFF to her daughter Regina. And of course, in the movie her daughter rather hilariously belittles her, mocks her, and treats her with utter contempt.
The problem is: in real life, it isn’t funny. A teen may never be that overt about their feelings on the outside, but that is often how they feel on the inside. Although a parent might be trying to avoid the pattern of their teenager being frustrated and mad and irritated with them, giving up parental authority to “be a friend” first is not the answer. There’s a time for that when they reach adulthood, but while they are in high school, under your roof, discarding authority to preserve the relationship usually results in the teen discarding the relationship!
By contrast, I loved how one boy on the survey shared that his mom “yelled at my friends because they were being stupid—and they liked it!” Their own moms weren’t that on top of things. They wanted an adult who showed that she cared if they did something stupid!
Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In