Apologize When Needed
Since we won’t always get it right, despite these strategies, we also need to practice offering apologies each and every time they are needed. “I’m sorry, honey. I know you care about Billy, and I shouldn’t have implied that you don’t. Will you forgive me?” You don’t need to necessarily agree (“Maybe this weekend, we could talk more specifically about why I think a tutor is so important, and how we can get the money to pay for it”), but you do need to apologize.
Apologies are important because our research with the happiest relationships found that we need to keep short accounts, be willing to make up, and always ask for forgiveness when we have wronged someone else—regardless of whether they have wronged us too. But also: when we know we’re going to have to apologize if we let our temper run away with us, we’ll be far less likely to do it!
So the next time you feel anger rising inside, try these strategies: refrain from venting, remove yourself from the conflict, pause before speaking, and apologize when it’s warranted. Instead of blindly following your emotion-driven instincts, take the time and make the effort to choose your response. Your relationships—and your own well-being—will be the better for it.
Are you reading Shaunti’s latest devotional, Find Joy? Please leave a book review on Amazon!
And check out her latest book (co-authored with her husband, Jeff), Thriving in Love and Money. Because you need a better relationship, not just a better budget.
Visit www.shaunti.com for more.
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