Three Keys for Keeping Holiday Stress at Bay

Key #3: Every day, set the right expectations

If you and I were to sit down in July, think about the Christmas season, and say, “What would my top advice to myself be about managing Christmas well this year?” I suspect that one of our top answers would be: “Keep things simple. It’s not about the perfect present or the best decorations; it’s about family, friends, and celebrating Jesus.”

The problem is that we don’t actually sit down and think about it in July – and if we did, our own advice might be tossed aside as soon as we see that extra toy we just have to find for our kids, or the request from the holiday party for the special cheesecake we just have to make from scratch. (They asked for our special recipe, after all!)

So, let’s now ask ourselves, “What would I have said was my top advice to myself about managing Christmas well this year?” If the answer is indeed some flavor of “keep things simple and remember what matters most,” then let’s treat that like a sort of compass. Every task, request, use of time, and even thought pattern and feeling gets checked against that compass. Will this task or thought pattern lead us toward “keeping things simple and remembering what matters most?” Or away from it? Once we start making decisions based on that compass, we will decide things like, “I would love to treat everyone with my cheesecake, but it is far more important to spend a few minutes with my lonely family member instead.” Or, “I know I feel guilty for not being able to afford more presents this year, but there is a lot of love in this house and that’s the most beautiful thing.” When we do that, we are far more likely to return to the type of special and sacred Christmas we are truly longing for, rather than the commercialized, rush-rush-rush Christmas that stresses us out.

As Ruth Chou Simons said in her Christmas devotional Emmanuel, “Many of us lack the eager anticipation we once knew in our youth when it comes to Christmastime … for so many of us, the joyous expectancy of a fun-filled holiday is overshadowed by unrealistic expectations and impossible standards. We replace expectancy with expectations.”

Friends, lets protect our relationships and our own well-being by daily making a point of replacing holiday expectations with holy expectancy. Let us remind ourselves what God has done for us – Heaven invaded earth! – and let Him fill us back up with the true joy and meaning of this special time of year.

*If you want a way to build true Joy in your life, no matter your circumstances, or know someone who does, consider my devotional Find Joy: A devotional journey to unshakable wonder in an uncertain world.

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