Minion Monday

Blog-wise, Mondays are always a killer for me. Today is no exception, with the oldest minion down for the count and home sick with a sore throat that is, alas, not sore enough to keep her quiet. I may not be able to get any real think-blogging done on Mondays, but the minions are always good for a laugh or twelve, so I hereby designate Mondays intellectual property of the Alexander minions.

Me: “Sienna, sometimes I think I’m so lucky to have a daughter like you.”

Sienna (smiling sweetly): “You are lucky.”

*

Charlotte: “Mommy, my eyes hurt.”

Sienna: “Don’t say that, Charlotte! If you tell Mommy your eyes hurt she’ll make you go to the eye doctor and get your eyes annihilated!”

*

Charlotte: “Mommy, I’m afraid to go to sleep because there’s a monster behind my door.“

Me: “How about if I check and make sure there’s no monster?“

Charlotte: *smiles and nods*

Me: *pulls door back and peeks around, then opens it wide* “See, look, there’s no monster there!“

Charlotte: “Well there was one, but Daddy killed it. With his sword.”

Me: “Good thing Daddy checked first, then!“

Charlotte: “If Daddy didn’t have killed him, he would have eaten you up when you checked behind the door.“

Me: “Wouldn’t you be sad if the monster had eaten me up?“

Charlotte: “Well, but all of your blood would have come out.”

Me: *stares at Bad Seed*

Charlotte: “And you would be dead.“

Me: “Goodnight, Charlotte.“

Charlotte: “Don’t you want to give me a kiss?“