Having children is probably one of the most wonderful gifts one can receive from God. They give parents that kind of joy that can hardly be described. They give meaning to one’s life and light during the latter seasons of one’s years. Finally, they are also the legacies one can leave behind.
Considering all these, it is not easy to bear their absence.
Some couples fail to have children even after so many years of trying. Single people who grow old without them may also feel the loss of something they never had.
As a single person who may soon lose my reproductive capacities, there are days when I feel that I could never have children of my own as well.
I am not saying that life no longer has meaning without children. Many couples find other means to be of help to the people around them and to serve God. Single people are also often the hands that reach out to relatives and friends in need.
But there are just days when you do feel as though something could be missing. This is especially true when you hear what some people around you say.
If you ever have one of those days, this Bible verse from the book of Samuel may be for you. For a brief background, however, we note that during this time, the man in the story had two wives. This is not to promote this practice during our time, but we work from the context we are given and find the treasure from the pain.
Remember when even Abraham had a son with the servant Hagar because his wife Sarah had no children?
Let us continue then with this story about a woman married to a man who had two wives. While she had no children, the other wife had sons and daughters. And to add to her pain, this wife would provoke her and cause her more suffering. As a result, she would weep and wouldn’t eat.
This is what happens even in real life, doesn’t it? In addition to your own loss, people would add to your misery with their careless comments and advice. Although they may mean well, it still doesn’t lessen the hurt their words have caused.
Where do we go when these things happen? Where do we find some comfort in our pain?
In our Bible story, we find the consoling verse from someone we may least expect it from: from the husband who loved the woman despite not having any children with her.
Here are the Bible verses so you can read the story in its entirety:
There was a certain man of Ramathaim, a Zuphite from the hill country of Ephraim, whose name was Elkanah son of Jeroham son of Elihu son of Tohu son of Zuph, an Ephraimite. He had two wives; the name of the one was Hannah, and the name of the other Peninnah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children.
Now this man used to go up year by year from his town to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests of the Lord. On the day when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to his wife Peninnah and to all her sons and daughters; but to Hannah he gave a double portion, because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb. Her rival used to provoke her severely, to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb. So it went on year by year; as often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat. Her husband Elkanah said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep? Why do you not eat? Why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”
-1 Samuel 1:8 (NRSVCE)
Let’s focus on the last verse:
“Hannah, why do you weep? Why do you not eat? Why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”
We may not hear an earthly husband saying it. We may not have anyone confirming it by saying the exact words. But we have a God in heaven who sees what we’re going through, who goes with us in our pain and who speaks His words of consolation through these Bible verses.
“Why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”
Children are so very wonderful and precious. And if they are such, how much more is the God we have by our side? Is He not more to us than ten sons? Is He not worth even more than a hundred or a thousand children?
God speaks to you today. He speaks softly and yet firmly in love.
For as long as He is with you, your life matters and your life has meaning.
Children can bring you joy, but so can God Himself. Children can love you and guide you in your older years. But so can God, who is Love Himself! God, who is with you night and day and who will never leave you or forsake you.
Let God Himself be your joy, your light, your comfort and your peace. He is so much more than we could even think or imagine Him to be.
In His words, you can find all the consolation and strength that you need.
“…even to your old age I am he,
even when you turn gray I will carry you.
I have made, and I will bear;
I will carry and will save.”
-Isaiah 46:4 (NRSVCE)
You may also want to read “Do Reborn Babies Reveal Our Longing for the Baby Jesus?”
Jocelyn Soriano is the author of Mend My Broken Heart, Defending My Catholic Faith and 366 Days of Compassion.
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