The second week of Advent is when my sixth child received his name. We’d gone to mass. We were in the choir loft, where we could see and still keep containment on five children ranging in age from eleven to two. We could also watch the oldest serve at the mass. The reading came from the Gospel of Luke, when Zechariah motions for a tablet and writes, “His name is John.” I knew in that moment, this would be our... Read more
In the parking lot after the first Sunday of Advent, my teen saw a car with a bumper sticker, “Blue lives matter.” He immediately announced he wouldn’t want to know them. Proposing that the person might love someone who is in law enforcement did not change his opinion about the bumper sticker or the unworthiness of those people –and this was right after mass. Would we decide someone was unworthy of knowing for having a Pro-choice sticker? For a politician... Read more
One of the joys of Chemo is the unpredictability of sleep. I both need tons and can’t on demand. Hence, this 3:23 AM writing contribution. My blog said thank you. The rest of me does not. Being grateful requires we recognize there is so much more to life than what we put into it, and so much of it is a gift we didn’t even ask for. The delight in a home made pie is more because we see the... Read more
Grace and gracefulness never guaranteed… Back in high school, I danced. Eventually, either the teachers tired of my persistence and/or I managed to get good enough to perform with the advanced troop on some occasions. One such moment included being on stage with a live Jazz Band Orchestra. We did a medley that transitioned from 50’s up through the ’80’s. We wore these poodle skirts with pedal pusher pants underneath. We were supposed to rip the skirts off at the... Read more
“How can heaven be paradise if some people will be divided from their loved ones? Say I go to heaven and the person I love most goes to Hell. I could never know permanent bliss without the people I love?” This is a tough question, and it’s not a theoretical one. It’s a voiced fear. How can Heaven be good if not everyone I love makes it? Here are the facts: 1) Hell exists. Jesus tells us as such, and... Read more
I crave approval and attention. Additionally, I want to be thought of as smart. I wish I didn’t want these things. Wish I didn’t worry about it –but I’m still somehow the kid who didn’t make it into the accelerated classes on merit, but on befriending the teachers. I’m still somehow stuck, convinced everyone else in the room is not only smarter than me but wondering why the hell I’m even here. Part of how I fight this, is to... Read more
Why I ordered new pants today… So I called my mom today and we visited. The subject came up about how we need to learn we cannot do it all, the opposite of what the world teaches. I’d just filled out forms to take a leave of absence from work, and I’d heard about my siblings, all who seemed to be overtaxing themselves in many directions. None of us thought we could do less. I thought about my growing up,... Read more
We hear the Gospels but we’ve heard them so often, sometimes we’ve lost our imaginative understanding of the reality they convey. In today’s Gospel from Luke 17:1-6 “Jesus said to his disciples, “Things that cause sin will inevitably occur, but woe to the one through whom they occur. It would be better for him if a millstone were put around his neck and he be thrown into the sea than for him to cause one of these little ones to... Read more
The problem with being a writer is, you have your past words to remind you of what you thought before you went through something. I’ve written about suffering, about embracing the cross, about the graces that come with enduring what must be, and that all love is based on sacrifice. Catholicism is beautiful and redemptive and restorative and full of hope and promise in reality, but one must will to embrace it. Living the day to day minutia of a... Read more
INSERT PICTURE OF ANNOYING SALES PERSON SAYING BUY NOW OR RUIN ALL HOLIDAYS FOREVER WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY HERE. If there’s a theme to November television, it’s buy now or regret forever. The commercials are convinced we will be dueling over dented cans of beans and oversized packages of white tennis socks if we don’t order everything for Christmas now now now now now now NOW. The world wants all the trappings of Christmas and trimmings of Thanksgiving... Read more
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