Church Sign Epic Fails, “Jesus Germs” Edition

Last updated on: January 8, 2016 at 8:30 pm by Christian Piatt

Yes, Ladies and Gents. After an extended hiatus, I bring you the resurrection of the infamous Church Sign Epic Fails. Got one you think I should post? Send it to cpiatt (at) christianpiatt (dot) com.

Come get contaminated by the Holy Spirit with us! Just don't touch me, you gross person. — Come get contaminated by the Holy Spirit with us! Just don’t touch me, you gross person. Oh, and fire the illiterate sign guy on your way in.

So, is this aimed at the parishioners or the priests?

That word you keep saying...I don't think it means what you think it means. — That word you keep saying…I don’t think it means what you think it means.

Bring us your kids and we'll change their sex or you can trade them for a new one! — Bring us your kids and we’ll change their sex or you can trade them for a new one!

First Hipster Church of Portland, folks. I'd tell you about it, but you've probably never heard of it. — First Hipster Church of Portland, folks. I’d tell you about it, but you’ve probably never heard of it.

Or beware of the naked person who offers you anything, really.

So, so many jokes here, but I'd rather not go STRAIGHT to hell, thanks. Make up your own, you skeezy pervs. — So, so many jokes here, but I’d rather not go STRAIGHT to hell, thanks. Make up your own, you skeezy pervs.

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