Matronage, Patronage, and Spirits

Matronage, Patronage, and Spirits

I’ve come across numerous inquiries regarding the paths of the Gods, Goddesses, Elements, and Spirits. The most common question I’ve received is regarding how one knows who are their matron and/or patron deity is. This piece is to lightly discuss the basics of matronage and patronages.

For beginner seekers, I often suggest working with deities that are automatic matrons and patrons due to birthright, pending which path you’re drawn to. For instance, Yamaya of the Yoruba tradition is one of the automatic goddesses/orishas matrons from descendants of children who traveled into the Disaporas during the Trans-Atlantic slave trade. She promised the children she guided, protected, and received into her waters that their children and future descendants will forever be her children. Regardless if the descendent went from “black” to “white” (passing as white by mixed race children during the time of slavery was a very common practice to receive freedom and/or preferential treatment). Being of direct Haitian descent, Erzulie Dantor, the mother of Haiti, is also my matron. Therefore, my matrons are Yemaya (due to being a descendent of the slave trade) and Erzulie Dantor (due to being of Haitian descent). Yes, you may have more than one matron (don’t allow anyone to tell you otherwise). Nonetheless, I do feel more connected to Erzulie than Yemaya. This is normal connection when an automatic matron feels a bit distant with you. To use an analogy: automatic matronage is similar to surrogacy. The surrogate mother is the womb/vessel that the child is kept safe within until birth. Yet, the egg that is fertilized is the biological and/or true mother. How I view this: Yemaya is the womb and Erzulie Dantor is the egg that I’m created from. I love them both, yet biologically, I’m Eruzlie’s. Granted, it’s possible for the surrogate mother to love her child just as much as if it came from her own egg. Many surrogates are active in their child(ren)’s lives.

Automatic matronage and patronage varies on location of birth (Romulus and Remus protects their citizen/children of Rome), date of birth (born on their feast day), history of lores (as how Yemaya promised that all descendants of the slave trade are her children), and prior communication from family members. What I mean by this is that Minerva is also my matron. My father offered me to her (before my conception) if she accepted him as one of her children. She wasn’t going to have my father, but the offer (naming me after her) appeased her. I did the same with my own children. Granted, my bond is stronger with Minerva (Especially in Medica form) than is with my own father. Yet, a bond nonetheless.

Second indication and/or exercise how to determine your matron/patron deity (deities) and/or spirits, is a self-exercise of knowing yourself. What are you drawn to you? Even reflecting what brought you comfort, joy, and security– especially during childhood. For instance, as a child, I always felt a deep reverence for cemeteries. As a child, I would walk to the nearby cemetery to read a book or cloud watch. Oftentimes, I would read aloud to the spirits of the cemeteries (talking or reading to headstones that looked as if they hadn’t been visited for years). It wasn’t until later that I was told that I was guided by loas (orishas, gods, spirits) of the dead and crossroads, especially being born on one of the many feast day of the Lemures (no accident). The deep connection I had with the cemetery is similar to those who find comfort in the woods. I personally find reflecting on the elements of youth: a time of innocence. Reflect on what seasons brought you joy, what school subjects you find interesting; were you excellent at art, sports, writing, and poetry? Childhood memories do hold keys of the earlier signs of when the gods and elements attempted to contact you prior to “outside” forces shutting them down. When you recall those source of happiness, revisit them… do they still hold that same feeling of bliss? If they continue to do so… research the elements and gods that are affiliated with the source of such comfort. Now, whomever “captures” you is most often your deity/spirit.

Don’t be discouraged if the sources of what once brought you solace no longer does. Many spirits and deities come to us in our time of need. Yet, once the need is no longer—they move on. Not to say that they no longer love you, it’s their time to step back and allow you to continue on YOUR journey. Similar to “human” parents who take a step back and allow their children to live their life on their own accord. They’re still there and ever present—yet, the exact ‘need’ is no longer needed, shall I say.

Lastly, what brings you happiness now? What brings you comfort presently? As a child, I loved storms. I remember my father taking me out during hurricane Gloria in 1985. The “rageful” winds felt like gentle kisses. I recall my father whispering, “Hekua Yansa!” Typically, I would ask him what something he said, that I had no idea what he is talking about, meant. Yet, I was too enthralled with the storm. Laughing hysterically when I saw a nearby tree plunge to the ground, I twirled around in the rain (keep in mind- I was only eight years old). I had no fear with storms, still don’t, but sheer fondness and a feeling of security and protection. Late in life, I moved to a town popular for beaches (I reside five minutes walking distance from the Atlantic Ocean). I had to be near water, particularly salt water (Yemaya’s domain) and when storms come… I understood why many are intrigued to be near the ocean (despite it being very dangerous). It was later in life that I knew Oya have been calling me. It all made sense; my childhood relaxation of cemeteries (Oya, guardian of cemetery and crossroads), storms (Oya’s domain), and water (Oya’s primordial domain prior to Yemaya’s claim). My “comfort” shifted, but lead me straight back to Oya. Find a connection to your past and current “soothe. Not all elements are alike and their deities who have specific domains, pending the specific elements.

Although I do have a connection to water, I feel intensely with saltwater vs. freshwater. My father loves freshwaters and his matron is Osun (Oshun), the goddess/orisha of freshwater/sweet waters. Even different rivers have different “feels.” While searching for your matron deity, one must be specific on what draws them. First, be board (water) then take it a step further and be more specific (fresh water, sea water, air in the form of ice, water in the form of rain, etc.). In addition, yes, it is possible to not have any specifics–simply loving the elements, no greater or lesser, in all its forms.

I hope this edification is clear for those who are searching for their matron/patron and deity. They do tell you who they are via symbolism and emotions. It first takes to “Know Thyself” to know their names… listen and feel for their message. At times, even our own personalities will reflect them (like mother/father like child). Brightest Blessings!