When God’s Voice Doesn’t Boom

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Growing up as a kid in church, I always imagined God as a big old guy on a gold throne in the clouds. He had a beard and long hair; definitely a mix between King Triton from The Little Mermaid and Zeus.

 I always imagined His voice was big and booming. Like thunder and drums and fireworks. If you heard God’s voice the ground would shake underneath you. If you heard God’s voice you would have no choice but to listen.

But God’s voice isn’t always thunder. Wouldn’t that make life easier if it was? What if God’s voice was so clear, so audible, and so unmistakable that there was never any confusion between His voice and our own?

And maybe God’s voice is thunder to some people. But it’s not always like that for me. Sometimes God’s voice is a whisper. It’s an exhale. It gets lost with all the other voices around me and within me. I wait for the drums and the fireworks and all I hear is the echo of my own voice.

 For years I thought I was just a bad Christian. What if I wasn’t spiritual enough? What if I wasn’t as in tune with the Holy Spirit? People around me boasted that they heard God’s voice so clearly, all the time, no questions asked. I wondered how they could be so sure. How did they know it was really God?

Maybe God’s voice doesn’t always have to be the loudest one to be the right one.

I’d like to think God’s voice is powerful even when it’s gentle.

There is so much noise all around us and it is constantly competing for our attention, sending us different messages. All this noisy chaos rings in our ears and confuses us and that’s when it’s easy to lose focus.

I have a strong sense of intuition. I’m a “go with your gut” type of girl. When I was deciding which college I wanted to attend, I prayed and prayed and prayed. I wanted the next four years of my life to have a deeper purpose. As I looked over the acceptance letters, there was no big, booming voice of God. There was a feeling in my gut and a sense of peace and I made a decision, hoping that this was the choice God wanted for me.

When my now-husband asked me to be his girlfriend, I prayed and prayed and prayed. I wanted to make sure I was making a good decision, not settling in relationships like I had done in the past. God’s voice didn’t come in over a loudspeaker. There was a feeling in my gut and a sense of peace and I made the decision, trusting that God was guiding me.

Maybe that is God’s voice. That instinct that moves us forward. That intuition that leads us down a certain path. That gut feeling that we can’t ignore.

Maybe God’s voice is more like gravity than thunder.

An undeniable force that pulls you towards His peace.  I’m assuming it’s different for everyone. I wouldn’t know how God speaks to anyone else but me.

Loud or soft, booming thunder or soft whisper, I guess what matters most is that God speaks in the first place.

And for as long as He’s willing to talk to me, I hope I’m always willing to listen.

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Alyssa Bacon-Liu is a new wife and southern California native who lives with her husband in Los Angeles. She is passionate about justice, equality, and anything sparkly. She blogs at All Things Beautiful where she chronicles her attempts to be bold, have faith, and embrace beauty. You can also find her on Twitter.

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