I Used To Be a Minister

I used to a be a Minister. I served in a ministry position for 12 years. For about 259 reasons I walked away from it, which was healthy & necessary at the time. Intuitively, I knew the storm brewing in my heart and life was bigger than I could handle. Also, I was one half [Read More…]

Black Lives Matter Conditionally

By the words of the media, the condition of our communities (the number of murders in Chiraq over the July 4th weekend, 82+ for example) & the narratives woven post a police brutality murder is that black lives matter conditionally. The cold hard reality is this: sometimes black lives matter, a lot of times they [Read More…]

My Big, Fat, Audacious Career Lessons, Mistakes & Risks

 I got laid off from my company last November, the day after Thanksgiving. The company was seriously shady & in preparation for their imminent bankruptcy they’d stop paying into unemployment for my state, where there were only 3 of hundreds of employees. Needless to say, none of us Michigander’s were able to collect unemployment while [Read More…]

I Switched Husbands

I got off the plane and in the car with 6 other women, perfect strangers. I was in Nebraska, a state I’d never been before nor expected to ever go. I was there as the keynote speaker for the women’s retreat, Jumping Tandem. Given the nature of my previous three years, keynoting was also unexpected. [Read More…]

Without Self Pity: Ruthless

Yesterday, I posted on my public FB page about life being impossible and awful and how I had no hope and therefore must die. Or…something like that. A bit ago, the company I was working for folded & all of sudden *poof* I’m unemployed. As it turns out, they were straight up swindlers. They owe a [Read More…]

I asked for two letters

A few weeks before Christmas, my 10 yr. old asked what he could give me for Christmas that would be meaningful for me. Truthfully, he asked what he could do for me, substituting as a Christmas gift. His Dad had mentioned a few tasks around the house that Ransom agreed to do in exchange for [Read More…]

39 Birthday Pearls

You must learn to be at home with yourself, both literally & figuratively. At home, clean up just for you. Cook well even when no one else is coming over. Shave your legs, just for you. Do better for yourself when alone, just for the love of you. Practice feeding, blanketing, soothing & caring for you, for the love of you. Others can and will do it, but true self-care starts & ends with yourself. Be at home with yourself. Heed the wise advice of someone smarter than me: “be who you needed when you were young.” [Read more…]

Divorce & Facebook.

I set the lap top down. I got up and went into the kitchen for the sharpest knife possible. I returned to my computer screen and I began stabbing it profusely until the knife went clear through. I then threw the laptop through my front window, shattering the glass, my laptop and my heart itself. [Read more…]

In Which I Pare Things Down

When my ex & I separated, I took so few things. I didn’t want a lot from that house, honestly. Over the years, I’d become completely overwhelmed with more than a decade of pat-rack accumulation. There was so much. So much stuff. The mess of that house was the face of our despair. I took [Read More…]

I Am at Peace

After years & years of angst & soul crushing sorrow, I am at peace. What I’ve been through to get here… …seems downright unmentionable. Peace born from resolve, is greater than happiness. But also, surprisingly there’s happiness too! I am so in love with my husband. My boys are priceless, rowdy treasures. And the joy of a bonus daughter? What four on earth could be more beautiful? I’d give them the sun, moon, stars & the ocean, each & every one. There’s something different [Read More…]