at Christianity Today:
When I became a Christian, most of my friends and family were baffled and disappointed. They could not understand why I was subjecting myself to a repressive falsehood. Sure, the church’s paintings are nice, but what about the ethics?
That’s why it was so moving to me that my best friend came to my baptism. She gamely let the priests shake holy water over her; she kept a wry, silent smile on her face while everybody else renounced Satan. I was under no illusion that she had changed her mind about Christianity and the church. That made her attendance more poignant, because it was a gesture purely in support of me.
I think of my baptism when I consider how Christians should respond when they are invited to gay weddings. (I’ve attended one same-sex wedding so far, in an Episcopal church.) People find it easier to notice judgment than acceptance. They find it especially hard to understand unconditional love. Whenever Christians can show that our love is not a reward for good behavior, we should do so.
This decision about attendance is easier for me, because I believe God calls some people to devoted, sacrificial love of another person of the same sex.