The theme of transparency has been up all week. Couples, colleagues, clients have wondered, why tell the truth? Isn’t it easier not to “hurt someone’s feelings” by not telling them how you really feel? Doesn’t saving the connection matter more than whatever the truth is? Others have spoken about what it is like to be on the other end of the truth-telling: the shock of hearing what is really going on, and then having the reaction that the other person... Read more
Yesterday, Seth Godin sent out a blog he subtitles “Santa Math.” He talked about all the ways people are stepping in to the world of the Internet and sharing their resources by blogging, showing videotapes, sharing their views through comments, giving tips to others. And not for any direct remuneration. In committing to write a book, I’ve felt myself pulled up into what seems to be a higher vibration of empowerment that is the current world of information sharing. I... Read more
I am fascinated by the process of manifestation. How does something that begins as an idea turn into something that we can see, taste, feel, read? As I look around me, I see the evidence of the process of manifestation everywhere. The keyboard I’m typing on is the result of countless creative impulses of huge numbers of people over many years. The couch I’m sitting on required people to imagine what a couch looks like, try out a range of... Read more
I’m sitting on an airplane. Since it’s not time yet to play our electronic devices (and I’m sitting between two nice, quiet men), what I can hear are the voices of two people behind me bitching about work. I can feel my body tightening with their complaining. I can also hear my old self in the middle of their conversation—all the times I’ve enjoyed the art of figuring out what is wrong. As I wended my way through the security... Read more
Today I was repairing our fence (several pickets were shattered when lightning struck a nearby cable box) when I dropped a box of nails. Instead of my typical thought (“Well, THAT was dumb–what a waste of time! Why didn’t I just put it where it would have been safe??”) it started a series of thoughts, specifically about success. I realized how much I’ve used the energies of money and time as the indicators of whether a venture is successful. Is... Read more
This is a time of upheaval. Institutions that we have relied upon to take care of us–banks, the government, industry, education, the military, health care–have all failed in their implied obligation to provide us with safety and security. This failure is wonderful news. As humans, we’ve spent thousands of years dependent on our leaders. We’ve been children willing to do as they tell us in exchange for what any good parent promises– security and protection. That devil’s deal meant giving... Read more
Since 2008 is getting long of tooth, I want to take a minute to reflect on the magic that has happened here. I’d heard about this wacky notion, that it’s important to live your dreams, blah blah. I had some idea that my life was fine because I worked hard (those who work hard get rewards, that sort of thing). Sure, I’d noticed that things happened that I’d hardly let myself hope for (get into graduate school to be a... Read more
I teach and use persona work pretty much every day. When someone is really stuck in an issue, it’s liable to be because a persona has been activated. Since our most difficult personas originated when we thought our survival was threatened, rigidity and unwillingness to soften are pretty clear signals that a persona has seized the steering wheel. I don’t mind playing with a lot of my personas. My Airhead, Agnes Angst, Mrs. Victoria Hudson-Smith and Mr. Fix-it can be... Read more
I had a brief foray into writing Country Western songs–they’re the best at expressing the true drama of life. Here’s one I especially liked (imagine a drawling, slow paced vocal): If blame feels so good, why don’t I feel better? It’s driving me out of my mind! If blame feels so good, why don’t I feel better? Not misery and pain all the time… I think I’ve mastered the art of blaming. I’ve got a whole cast of characters: The... Read more
In the past six months, I’ve stepped consciously out into the space of the unknown. We opened the Boulder Center for Conscious Living, we bought a new home–I’ve basically turned my life upside down. After being in the same office for 17 years and the same house for 13, life has looked very different from how it used to be. What used to be smaller and tighter–my office, my house, my schedule–now are big and spacious. Some of the time... Read more
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