US Senator Fined for Lewd Foot-Tapping

Come to think of it,

I recall hearing some foot-tapping during my sermon last Sunday.  Looks like I’m good to go for another term!

How sweet it is to see the mighty and the
righteous fall!  Note that “mighty”
and “righteous” are not terms that belong in the same descriptive sentence,
except in the wacky world of McChurch.

Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho), declared by the
Christian Coalition in December 2003 to have a 100% voting record on their
issues, is of uncertain denominational affiliation.  His expedient withdrawal from the
presidential campaign of Gov. Mitt Romney this week may, however, provide a
clue.

Nevertheless, it
seems that Sen. Craig may be one of the most misunderstood persons in America.  He keeps getting nailed for sending the wrong
signals to the wrong people. 

His “Political Rap
Sheet” has some very interesting notations. 
In 1982, then Congressman Craig went on national news to deny rumors
involving cocaine and sex with male congressional pages.

In October 2006, gay
activist blogger, Mike Rogers, published allegations that Craig was
homosexual.  Craig called the allegations
“completely ridiculous.”

In an interview on
May 14, 2007, with the Idaho Statesman,
Craig responded to a Boise
gay man’s allegations that he had stood in a sexually inviting way and followed
him around for a half-hour.  Craig’s
response:  “Once again, I’m not gay, and
I don’t cruise, and I don’t hit on men. 
I have no idea how he drew that conclusion.  A smile? 
Here is one thing I do out in public: 
I make eye contact, I smile at people, they recognize me, they say, ‘Oh,
hi, Senator.’  I don’t go around anywhere
hitting on men, and by God, if I did, I wouldn’t do it in Boise, Idaho!  Jimmy!”

That settles that, I
guess. 

Once again, the
Senator’s actions have been misinterpreted. 
On June 11, 2007, he was arrested at the Minneapolis-St. Paul
International Airport
on suspicion of lewd conduct.  He pleaded
guilty to a misdemeanor charge of disorderly conduct on August 8, paying a fine
of $1,000 and $575 in fees and receiving a sentence of one year of unsupervised
probation.

“In hindsight, I
should not have pleaded guilty,” he said. 
“I was trying to handle this matter myself quickly and
expeditiously.”  Now, the thought lingers
that, if he pleads guilty to this
offense, with all its implications, what does he do when it comes to a vote on
the Senate floor – handle the matter quickly and expeditiously?

It gets better.

The arresting officer
apparently sat in a bathroom stall as an undercover agent.  For those who believe in the expeditious use
of time by public sector employees, you will be pleased to know how that time
is spent.  Homeland Security hits
incredibly close to home, I suspect. 

After thirteen
minutes of sitting there (on a donut cushion, one hopes), the agent saw Sen.
Craig lingering outside and peaking through the stall’s door crack at him from
the stall next door.  Here is the
arresting officer’s report:

At 1216 hours, Craig tapped his right foot. I recognized this as a
signal used by persons wishing to engage in lewd conduct. Craig tapped his toes
several times and moves his foot closer to my foot…. The presence of others
did not seem to deter Craig as he moved his right foot so that it touched the
side of my left foot which was within my stall area. Craig then proceeded to
swipe his hand under the stall divider several times.

Craig’s answer was
that “…I have a wide stance when going to the bathroom, and my foot may have
touched (the officer’s).”  He openly
criticized himself for not engaging counsel.

Wow!  This is a US Senator we are talking about
here – and one with a 100% Christian Coalition rating, at that!  Given the fact that there are now some dozen,
more or less, current and former members of Congress running for President, we
may be in bigger trouble than we realize. 

It might be well
advised to follow these folks into the restrooms and see if they are tapping
their feet.  We knew that Congress has
been tapping its feet for years when it comes to addressing the real problems
in which our nation seems to be mired at the moment.  But for cryin-out-loud, let’s reserve the
foot-tapping for the official business – not the unofficial business.

Imagine a world in
which people are arrested for foot-tapping in a bathroom stall and given a pass
for foot-tapping in the seats of power: 
Foot-tapping on the economy; foot-tapping on health care reform;
foot-tapping on foreign policy and Iraq; foot-tapping on education;
foot-tapping on lying members of Congress.

Come to think of it,
I recall hearing some foot-tapping during my sermon last Sunday.  Looks like I’m good to go for another term!