The Best Gift You Can Give This Christmas

The Best Gift You Can Give This Christmas

Do you want to give a family member or beloved friend the perfect gift this Christmas? What about your worst enemy or least-liked acquaintance? What if I told you you already have the perfect gift that you can give to your best friend or your worst enemy? And, bonus, you would be gifting yourself a present as well! 

There Was This One Post…

I can’t remember how long ago, but I posted something regarding a hot take on an individual and his behavior online. This person is a celebrity athlete whom I thought acted quite poorly towards someone else. 

My post also discussed how I did not care for this person’s choice to be a spokesperson for a huge corporation that I believe has hurt a lot of people for profit. 

I received pushback from a family member on the post by way of comments. I tried to respond as graciously as I could, and I am not sure how it was received.

Being Americans, we are protected by the First Amendment, and those who fight and or fought for it, to speak freely. 

Being Christians, we should not only use this freedom wisely, but to build others up. 

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29

Unfriended

Ultimately, this person decided to unfriend me online. Thanks to the gift God has given us to use which we will discuss, I have no ill will towards this individual at all. 

I share this not to besmirch them in any way, but to share something that I think, sadly, is common for us in today’s world. 

This is certainly not the first time I have been unfriended, not necessarily for hot take posts (or maybe so?), but for a myriad of reasons. 

I have also done my share of unfriending as well. Whether, I can no longer take the barrage of hate-filled posts, or I see the person as a false-teacher leading people astray, I try to prayerfully make the decision in what I allow myself to see/ be a part of. 

Due Diligence

I am not saying that I was the right one in this or in any other situation. I did take the post down as I recognized that it did not necessarily “build people up” or “benefit” those reading it. 

Even though I still believe in the heart of what I said. 

If at all possible, we are called to be peacemakers. 

“Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can you make it salty again? Have salt among yourselves, and be at peace with each other.”- Mark 9:50

In past unfriending, I have tried to reach out directly, 

“Hey, I noticed that you have unfriended me… Was there something that I said or did that I need to be made aware of? I would really like to repair the relationship if you are willing, and apologize.” 

In my recent interview with Krista Bontrager and Monique Duson of Center for Biblical Unity, we talked a good deal on how Christians should fight for the Body of Christ and for friendship. 

It makes me sad to think that cancel culture is so prevalent that it now affects families.

But hasn’t it always been a reality via the silent treatment, divorce, or other means? 

HEAR ME OUT: This post is in no way excusing trauma, betrayal, or abusive relationships. 

The Best Gift

We started out this post by exploring the idea of gift giving in this season of Christmas. 

God brings people together on purpose. That reunion, that event, that run in at the UPS store- these are appointments set by God. 

What are you going to do when you run into the person that unfriended you in the buffet line? Forgive them. 

The person that hurt you this year and they do not even know what they did, but you do? Forgive them. 

This person in your life, a “heavenly sandpaper” person that always rubs you the wrong way for your refinement: you forgive them in advance! 

THE BEST GIFT YOU GIVE A PERSON (and yourself) IS FORGIVENESS. 

But they have not apologized to me, you say— to that I say, “Romans 5:8”. 

 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.- Romans 5:8

The apology is not the get out of your heart-jail free card, Christ’s grace is. 

Now What? 

Friend, I am working on this too. If you need help forgiving- ASK THE LORD! God wants us to forgive. Try praying something like this: 

“Holy Spirit, please help me have forgiveness in my heart towards this person. Help me let them go off of the judgment seat. I lay this person at your feet. I lay my feelings towards them in your hands. Please give me a heart of grace. In Jesus’s Name. Amen” 

After you have forgiven a person, you might have to remember that you have. 

Here are some tips that have helped me: 

• Satan loves to ruin any joyful family event: pray in advance. Recognize bad attitudes that are brewing in your home, and pray for help before you get to the function. 
• Pray for the person in question. That’s a commandment!

• But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,— Matthew 5:44

• Hope the best and believe the best for them. This is probably just as hard as the forgiveness piece. No one is telling you to lower a boundary for yourself. If this person is a dangerous person, then steer clear. If not, try to believe the best for them and about them.
• Move on. We are not the Lord, so we do not lord things over people. 

Forgiving is so freeing.

Because of God’s grace, I received the gift of being forgiven. It is because of His grace, I have been able to forgive. Let me tell you, the weight that leaves you is truly the best gift you will ever receive.