A starting point

No matter where you desire to go in life, you must have a starting point from which you can proceed. On any given day, everyone has a starting point. Yet too often you may not be willing to see or acknowledge your own starting point, and consequently you’ll have trouble making progress toward your goals. It is a sad irony that your very unwillingness to acknowledge unpleasant circumstances can help to keep you stuck in those circumstances.

Acceptance will enable you to establish a starting point, and then to move successfully past that starting point toward whatever you desire. Success requires not only that you know where you want to go, but also that you acknowledge where you are right now. It is of little value to find your destination on a map if you cannot also find your present location. Acceptance will clearly show you your present location, and thereby enable you to get started on the road to where you have chosen to go. When you deceive yourself about where you are right now, it becomes impossible for you to effectively take steps in the direction of where you wish to go. Yet when you can truly accept the reality of your present circumstances, the pathway toward the life of your dreams becomes clear and accessible.

Acceptance doesn’t mean being passive. If there’s something you want to change, you can take action to change it. Yet before you take that action, you must first accept the reality of the situation so that your actions will be effective. Acceptance doesn’t mean that you approve of or support something. It just means that you see it for what it is, that you don’t deceive yourself about it, and that you don’t continue to punish yourself by hiding from it.

Most likely your current circumstances are not ideal. But becoming frustrated or angry or bitter about them, or denying that they exist, will not achieve anything positive. Instead, look calmly and dispassionately at your circumstances. They are real. They are a factor in your life right now, and that’s just the way it is. No amount of grumbling or fighting or complaining will make them better. What will make them better is positive, effective action. And in order to take effective, positive action toward what you want to be, you must first accept what is.

The sooner you accept the disappointments, the limitations and the shortcomings in your life, the sooner you can move past them. Acceptance will help you to see clearly, to learn and to grow. Think of a baby learning to walk. When the baby stumbles and falls, he doesn’t get depressed, or paranoid, or embarrassed, or angry. He doesn’t develop a guilt complex, or ulcers, or high blood pressure. He doesn’t try to pretend like the fall didn’t happen. He simply pulls himself up on the nearest supporting object. He enthusiastically tries again, accepting the fact that he’ll have to fall many times before learning to walk. In an environment of acceptance, true learning and growth take place. Positive progress is made.

When you deny your difficulties or refuse to see them, that’s really an insult that you’re perpetrating on yourself. By refusing to see or acknowledge reality, you’re sending yourself a message, a negative message that you’re not capable of dealing with those things. You’re building powerful negative expectations for yourself. You’re making the decision to hold yourself back from the great accomplishments of which you’re capable. You’re allowing the obstacles in your life to overpower you.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. The fact is, you are entirely capable of accepting reality and of acting to improve that reality by using whatever resources are available to you, by using your intelligence, by using your skills, by using your discipline, your focus, your ambition.

When you can accept and clearly see your current situation, you begin to also see the positive aspects of that situation. You begin to see the possibilities for making true and lasting improvements. Acceptance will cause your confidence level to soar to new heights. Because by accepting what is, you’re sending yourself a positive message that you are fully capable of dealing with whatever situation confronts you.