Don’t Make Me Smack You With a Ruler in Public This Weekend

Don’t Make Me Smack You With a Ruler in Public This Weekend September 23, 2009
Bring me one of these. Couldn't hurt.

This Saturday (September 25) I’ll be at the annual San Diego Christian Writers Guild’s writer’s conference, where I’ll be boring confusing infuriating inspiring writers via the class I’ll be teaching, “Surviving the Blog Clog.” (I’ll be doing that class twice: first at 11 a.m., and then again at 2 p.m. I’ll also be at the Friday night, pre-conference meet-and-greet. You can see all the classes and workshops being offered on the conference’s schedule.)

Throughout Saturday I’ll also be available for 15-minute, one-on-one consultations. I sit at a table; you sign up for one of my 15-minute slots; come your time you take a seat opposite me; you show me your work or tell me about where you’re at and/or would like to be with your writing; I dispense advice so awesome that by the day’s end you’ll probably be up for a Pulitzer; one of the conference staff informs me that my huge tip jar is inappropriate and requests I ditch it; we go home.

I wrote about my experience at the conference last year in Humbled by Beginning Writers. Read it right now or I’ll smack you with a ruler.

Sorry. Getting into teacher mode.

Hey. Nobody said writing is easy.

Come to this conference! It really is a fantastic. You’ll love it. Plus, you’ll finally get to realize your deepest and most fervent dream, which of course is to meet me in person. You think I’m fun on this blog? Wait’ll you get a load of my lapel flower! Go ahead. Lean in close to smell it. I dare you.

Ahh. Good times.

Hey, about this class I’m teaching, “Surviving the Blog Clog.” Many of you guys are Major Bloggers. Any advice you’d advise me to pass along to my class? Any tips, input, thoughts on what does and/or doesn’t make blogging work for you? Do you like blogging? Do you hate it? Did you start out thinking you’d like it, but then later felt maybe not so much? Have you found it easy to attract readers to your blog? How did you do that? If you’ve had trouble attracting readers, why do you think that is? Do you read other people’s blogs? Do you read mine? How often? Do you constantly advise everyone you know to read my blog, hounding them until you’re sure they regularly are? Why not? What’s your problem? Do you really think you have anything better to do with your life than making sure other people read my blog? Why do you think that? What’s your problem? Do you think I’m funny? Really? How funny? Do you think I’m being funny right now? How funny do you think I’m being right now? How about now? Now? Now? Now?

Ahhh. Good times.

But seriously: Blogging advice, anyone?

Twitterpate me.

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  • Have you heard of Strongbad? The way you write sometimes makes me think of the Strongbad email stuff. Its at if you haven't checked it out yet. 🙂

  • Tim: You're off my blogroll? Not on purpose. What's your blog url again?

  • Do you like blogging?

    Yes, which is funny because I used to despise writing (it took to long). Now I love to write. I enjoy the conversation with regular commentors, but I also think of it as something that my kids will someday peruse when they are adults to see what I was thinking when I was their age.

    Have you found it easy to attract readers to your blog?

    No, it has slowly grown some over time, but I think overall that blogs like mine are a dime a dozen, so it will probably never grow too much.

    Do you read other people’s blogs?

    Yes, I have about 40 in my google reader.

    Do you read mine?


    How often?

    Every time ya post!

  • my advice is stick to a schedule. Just like regular writing you need to write often and a lot.

    Me? I typically write 2 or 3 days into one blog post. While it’s a lot of writing and the content is jumbled at times (My mind is adhd sometimes. One thing always distracts me to another thing….) You’re getting several days of material instead of just getting 1 short post every day.

    I feel like this works because it allows me time to think and process everything thats happened. And you can see how everything relates in my mind by the way the topics are lined up….

    Okay FINE. I’m too adhd to write every single day. Sheesh. I still think it works.

    Currently I have a list of followers, because my blog is no longer public (which is a rant in and of itself, soooo not getting into that) I encourage new readers, but I do need your email account. I don’t email you (it’s how I unlock it for you)

    While its a pain, it allows me to write to an audience I choose, and still maintain privacy from unwanted persons. It just serves as ‘pressure’ for me to write and censor myself. Which I find a good thing. Keeps me on track.

    I do read other blogs. Um, John Shore’s…. The bloggess, The Writer’s Washroom, Laurell K hamilton’s blog… to name a few.

    I started out thinking that I wasn’t going to be able to maintain a blog, that it was a waste of time and pointless.That just like regular pen and paper journals I’d stick with it for a week then it would crash and burn.

    I’ve been blogging for about 2 years now. december will mark a year with blogger. I try to write in the early morning or late evening. I always listen to music when I write, and the musical inspiration decides the title, and lyrics are frequently written in the posts. Mostly because I type what I hear. 🙂

  • Strongbad is the shit. Oops, I cussed again.

  • I have finally figured out how to get people to read my 2 blogs. My stats usually look like an electrocardiogram. But what you do is this. Put your blog link on your E-mail signature. Then have someone hijack your E-mail and send messages with the subject line “Caro Amigo” to everyone you know. I have had coworkers congratulate me on my blog today. A well known life coach sent me a reply, “Si, nice job!”. So there you have it. I almost didn’t change my password. My readership has gone way up!

  • Oh, I forgot to mention that my stats did get something of a rise when you put me on your blogroll. But now that you’ve taken me off, it is flatline city. But we’re not bitter! I just have to earn my way back into your good graces.

  • John, it’s

    It would be nice to get my 15 minutes with you. But chilly Finland is pretty far from beautiful San Diego. I love SoCal, Enjoy.

  • Latoya

    Twitterpate you?

  • How did the conference go?