From My Mom’s Husband: “May This Event Serve as a Healing in Your Life.”

From My Mom’s Husband: “May This Event Serve as a Healing in Your Life.” March 31, 2010

Last night I got a short email from the psychologist I just learned was married to my mom for 25 years. (See yesterday’s I Just Found Out My Mother Died — Five Years Ago.)

As a sign-off , he wrote, “May this event serve as a healing in your life.”

Wasn’t that kind of him? Sure, maybe not as kind as letting my sister and me know five years ago that our mother had passed away. (Yes, he knew of us both — and getting in touch with me is as easy as Googling my name.) But let’s not nitpick. Plus, the ways of a trained “healer” (as his website describes him) can be unfathomably mysterious. My own mother, for instance, had a master’s degree in psychology; her second husband (the one between my father, who was a salesman, and her last husband) was also a psychologist. My mother was quite extremely keen on letting you know that she thought of herself as a spiritually enlightened healer. Existing “on a whole other spiritual level” was my mom’s entire thing in life.

And yet, “enlightened healer” is not really the first description that pops to mind when I think of her.

Ah, the mysteries of the self-proclaimed spiritual healers. Who can fathom them?

(My reply to mom’s husband’s email consisted of, “Yo, friend. You might want to back off the superciliousness inherent in your ‘May this event serve as a healing in your life.’ You don’t even know me.”)

Hey, speaking of people who do know me, from the very bottom of my heart I want to thank each and every one of you who have written in to either share with me your own sad story, or to thank me for sharing mine, or to simply send me love and support. I’ve become busy as of last night and today, but please know that I’ve carefully read each and every such message sent to me, and each has touched me in a way that’s almost … disarmingly gratifying, frankly. This is the first time my blog has ever afforded me an emotional experience so singularly rewarding. You guys have made me feel not just good, but great. You’ve made me feel great, and loved, and appreciated, and … handsome.

Okay, maybe not handsome.

But kind of! It’s been that great!

I’m extremely appreciative of you all. At a time like this, it’s sooooooo great to know you’re being heard by people who actually … get it. What a gift you guys are to me.


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