This morning I received this from a woman named Barb (who is happy to share it [along with her first name]):
Dear John,
I want to thank you for your book Seven Reasons Women Stay In Abusive Relationships. After thirty years of marriage to a man abusive on every level, I walked away eight months ago. Within two weeks I came across your book and it has kept me from going back to a potentially deadly situation. I read Seven Reasons every day for several weeks. When I felt like going back to him, I just read it to remind myself of why I wasn’t going to.
What made it hard to leave before was the spiritual abuse and power he held over me. Being in ministry since we met, I stayed for the “sake of the Gospel.” (How backwards is that?)
Your “rabid dog” phrase* kept me grounded. You made me laugh, made me cry, but mostly, made me think about myself for once. You nailed it! The divorce is almost final, and God has provided me with a car, a home, a job that I love and yes … I am happy having my own life for once: my own food in the refrigerator, my own TV shows, my own place to sit and have coffee—all exactly like you said it would be. It is freeing and glorious! (And after some adjusting, my adult children are really truly happy for me).
I just had to write and say thank you for playing a huge role in saving me. God bless you! EVERY women’s shelter should be equipped with this book.
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* ” … . If you’re a woman in an abusive relationship who recognizes these thought patterns as your own, think this: Rabid. Dog.
A rabid dog can be just as loving, cuddly and respectful as any other dog. But then suddenly he literally snaps, and goes crazy violent. Then he calms down again, and becomes just as sweet as can be. Until he has another attack.
An abusive man has psychological rabies. He has a disease. It’s a curable one—but it is a disease. …”
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