When I was a wee lass, I watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and I’ve watched it every year of my life since. I fell in love with Rudolph, Hermey, Clarice and Yukon Cornelius — even the Bumble.
Not so much Santa Claus.
My Santa-Free Christmas
Actually, if you were to come to my house, you’d see all sorts of Christmas ornaments and decor: pinecones, birds, Nativity scenes, glass fruit and nuts, Irish harps and a Brigid’s Cross, even the odd deer (and zebra).
But the closest I get to Santa are a long-robed Father Christmas, a bearded guy in green paddling a canoe with forest animals, and this guy, who, by his flaming torch, green robe and cornucopia hat, is obviously the Ghost of Christmas Present.
It All Began With Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
Lest you doubt the power of images and media on young minds, it was Rudolph that set me on the path to my no-Santa Christmas.
Frankly, the Santa Claus of the 1964 stop-motion-animated special is a jerk.
He’s not the only one — reindeer Comet, the reindeer-games coach, and Rudolph’s dad Donner don’t come off well either (though they do redeem themselves) — but the Santa created by writer Romeo Muller is no jolly old elf.
Not only does he whine at his wife and grump at the elves, his behavior toward Rudolph is unpardonable.
Santa Starts Off Badly and Gets Worse
Upon meeting the nearly-newborn fawn, Santa’s all smiles — until the red nose comes out. The best he can come up with is hoping Rudolph will “grow out of it,” if he wants to pull Santa’s sleigh.
Chastised by the boss, Donner makes little Rudolph put on a fake nose before heading to the Reindeer Games, saying, “Santa can’t object to ya NOW.”
Personally, I think Donner would have been cool with the nose if Santa hadn’t already rejected it.
At the Games, Rudolph pulls off a spectacular first flight. But, when the fake nose pops off, there’s Santa again, berating poor Donner, with, “Donner, you should be ashamed of yourself. What a pity. He had a nice takeoff, too.”
SANTA IS THE WORST.
On the Other Hand, There’s Clarice
Then, Rudolph runs into my personal hero, little doe Clarice, whose whispered “I think you’re cute,” inspired Rudolph’s soaring debut.
Clarice: “You… you promised to walk me home.”
Rudolph: “Aren’t you going to laugh at my nose, too?”
Clarice: “I think it’s a handsome nose, much better than that silly false one you were wearing.”
Rudolph: “It’s terrible. It’s different from everybody else’s.”
Clarice: “But that’s what makes it so grand. Why, any doe would consider herself lucky to be with you.”
CLARICE IS THE BEST.
Into the Wild With a Damaged Psyche
Rudolph and elf Hermey — whose dental ambitions earn him scorn from the Head Elf — run away from Christmastown into the snowy North Pole wilderness.
Although their new pal, miner Yukon Cornelius, thinks Rudolph’s nose is fine, Rudolph endlessly frets that its red glow puts them in danger from the Abominable Snowman, a k a, the Bumble.
Yes, Rudolph, in the white vastness of the Arctic waste, as you’re walking with a ginger-bearded miner with a red hat, and a golden-haired elf, both in bright blue jackets, not to mention Yukon’s yapping team of mismatched sled dogs, your little red nose is definitely the thing that will give you all away.
You see what Santa did psychologically to Rudolph? Even the little deer can’t see beyond his “nonconformity” now.
What Turns the Tide in Rudolph’s Favor?
Then, after all the adventures, Rudolph, now grown (and having grown a pair along the way) returns to Christmastown, only to discover that his parents and Clarice are in the Bumble’s clutches.
Apparently, Donner felt a lot of remorse after Rudolph ran away and headed out to find his “little buck.”
He told his wife this is “man’s work,” but, in a surprising bit of 1964 feminism, she ignored him and promptly headed out, with Clarice in tow.
So, Rudolph hears this from Santa — whom he still calls “sir” — and what is Santa most worried about? Is it the three deer, including one fawn, being turned into venison sausage?
Oh, no.
Says the ever-compassionate Santa, “I’m very worried. Christmas Eve is only two days off, and without your father, I’ll never be able to get my sleigh off the ground.”
Priorities much, dude?
Then, after Rudolph, with help from Hermey and Yukon, saves everyone, and Yukon returns from the apparent dead because “Bumbles bounce!,” Santa has a change of heart.
And what inspired his sudden acceptance of Rudolph? Did his heart grow three sizes that day? Did the spirit of love and joy overcome him?
No. A huge, dangerous storm has hit, and Santa declares, “Christmas is going to be canceled.”
Dear Santa: It’s Not About You
BTW, that’s a bone I need to pick with every darn Santa movie and TV show out there, in which Santa not doing his deliveries somehow means there is no Christmas.
Christmas is not about Santa, as all Christians know.
Even the Santa-clad Grinch discovers this, in Dr. Seuss’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
And I quote:
“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”
So there, Santa.
Back to Rudolph …
Anyway, what changes Santa’s mind?
He gets a blast in the eye from Rudolph’s red nose, and …
Santa: (joyfully) “Rudolph, Christmas is not off, and you’re going to lead my team!”
Rudolph: “I am?”
Santa: “Yes, sir. (Rudolph’s nose glows brighter) You and that wonderful nose of yours.”
Rudolph: “My nose, sir?”
Santa: “Ho, ho, ho! From what I see now, that’ll cut through the murkiest storm they can dish up. What I’m trying to say is… Rudolph, with your nose so bright, won’t you guide my sleigh tonight?”
Oh, now you like his nose. Now you do, when it’s useful to you, when it helps you do your thing.
My little-kid brain learned an important lesson that day, “That which is useful is always acceptable — to the extent that it is useful.”
That little nugget has served me well, especially in understanding the working world. But, in the moment, Rudolph proves that he, unlike the utilitarian-minded Santa, has a big soul.
He replies, “It will be an honor, sir.”
The Best Lesson From Rudolph
So, Rudolph, rejected and humiliated, refuses to take the path of resentment and bitterness and instead leads the way, also keeping his promise to rescue the sad inhabitants of the Island of Misfit Toys.
And that was another lesson, “Never let the jerks get you down.”
Can You Still Watch Rudolph?
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer has already had its annual CBS airings, but it continues many more times on cablenet Freeform, and is available to stream on Roku via the free ReDiscover Television channel, and the subscriber Awesome Cartoons and Yule Log channels.
It can also be digitally purchased (for $9.99) or bought on DVD from Amazon.
Image: CBS
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