I go a bit bonkers whenever I see other witches’ behaving badly, but the real kicker is when I realize that I’m the one who’s fallen off the broomstick or it’s shoved firmly up my behind. Can you relate? Here’s my list of 13 behaviors I’ve been guilty of at least a few times, along with tips for stopping being a badly behaving witch.
#13 Being the Super Serious Witch
If you can’t remember the last time you laughed out loud, you’re doing witchcraft wrong. Humor is magic, not merely when times are easy but finding a funny in difficult times can be spellbinding. Pull that broomstick out of you-know-where.
Stop: Lighten up, witches! I realize that there is much to be concerned about right now, but there comes a time for fun. Connect with the happy part of your inner child. Blow some bubbles. Laugh until you pee your pants a bit. The next time someone posts a comment that gets under your skin, respond with a funny meme. It’s only life after all.
#12 The Green-Eyed Monster
Staring longingly at pictures of other witches’ altars for hours on Instagram is a sign of possible jealousy. Beyond this sort of harmless comparison, you may be truly jealous if you find yourself wondering how so-and-so manages to afford that trip to Salem. Jealousy crosses the line to envy when we start thinking “why is he doing that amazingly cool ritual and I’m not?” Hello, pity party.
Stop: The next time you find yourself wishing that you had that $500 cloak instead of Mr. Fancy Pants Witch, acknowledge it. Don’t let it get any bigger than that. It’s normal to want nice things. Don’t let it go further to questioning why you don’t have it or thinking that he doesn’t deserve it. Practice saying, “I’m so happy for you” until you mean it.
#11 Riding That High Horse
Listen to me about this: being holier the rest of us is a sign of low self-confidence. You might be fooling yourself but I can see right through it. If you love to proclaim that your magic is superior, ask yourself if it really is. I get it that you’re a subject matter expect. If you feel that everyone is unenlightened, then just maybe you need to climb down from your horse.
Stop: Talking long enough to see if anyone is listening. I know it’s exciting to share knowledge. However, there’s a fine line between sharing it and being a puffy pants. This is one I am very aware of. Yes, I know loads about everything…joking…but letting others share what they know is actually a great way to learn.
#10 Clinging To The Past
Confession: I was guilty of this for ages. We can cling to our past hurts like a life raft when in fact they are drowning us slowly. Let it go. Do whatever you need to do to accomplish this. There is so much to be found in the present. Are you wearing your past hurts like a badge of honor? If you think I’m being insensitive, let me tell you that I have known all manner of trauma in my life. Read my blogs to find out more. Carrying this shit around with me just got too heavy, so I put it down for good.
Stop: Breathe in and out. What can you release right now? Get out the energetic scissors to cut some cords. Deep clean everything else.
#9 Stirring Someone Else’s Cauldron
Sticking that pointy nose of yours in everyone else’s business makes it pretty hard to focus on your own life, let only witchery. Too often I see witches’ who are so fixated on “helping” others while their own life is a case study in chaos. If you’re an empath, you may be picking up on everyone else’s pain. This is not your business unless they seek your support. There are also those witches who lie and manipulate to get more attention, the so-called drama llamas. They are also putting their wand where it doesn’t belong.
Stop: Let others ask you for help. Don’t be anyone’s self-appointed savior. Obtain consent. Mind your own cauldron and life will be magical.
I know many of us are empaths, psychics and other varieties of energy enthusiasts. A witch’s ability to connect with the vibes others’ send out is a major part of what many of us do. BUT it’s got to be on our terms, not theirs. If you interpret everything as a personal attack or thing that everyone is talking about you, it’s time to get over it. #1 below is also associated with this.
Stop: Shield. Protect. Next time you think someone is attacking you personally, ask yourself if that is really what’s going on. Even if it is, is it such a big deal? Work on toughening up that witch’s skin.
#7 Not Realizing That Other Witches’ Have Feelings, Too
Holy Hekate, this is something that is super easy to do, especially on social media. Someone says something and we immediately think that they are horrible/evil/worthless. Blocked. Banned. Deleted.
Stop: In my article about Toxic Witches, I gave some basic tips on cutting others some slack. We all say stupid things at times. When some other witch appears to have fallen off their broom, take a moment to consider if this is in keeping with their usual ways. Then contemplate whether there’s another possible explanation. See #13.
#6 Having Blinders OnThe world is falling down around you while you listen to an animal spirit journey. The house is a disaster. The kids have eaten cereal for every meal for the past two weeks. The cat is cleaning her own litter box.
Stop: Take care of the mundane stuff first then do the witchcraft. This is not optional.
#5 Being Too Nice
Maybe we’ve moved too far away from that old wicked witch stereotype. If you’re the one always accommodating everyone else and soothing hurt feelings, it might be that you’re being Gilda the Too-Nice Witch. I think this is a way that we lie to ourselves or let our insecurities get the best of us. Not everyone needs to like us and we don’t need to make everyone happy. Repeat daily until you believe it. That’s what I’m doing.
Stop: Turn all that compassionate magic back at yourself. Remind yourself (daily if necessary) that being a witch doesn’t require you to please everyone. In fact, the opposite is true. NOTE: This is one that I have recently realized that I am guilty of.
#4 Not Knowing What You’re Doing
Intuitive witchcraft is so on trend these days. I’m all for it, except that knowing the basics is the best way to be able to use your intuition. I debated whether to swap this one out for “lying to yourself.” Thinking that winging it is always a great idea is definitely a form of self-deceit.
Stop: Let your inner witch be your guide, then seek out standard practices. Or vice verse. Balanced magic is almost always best.
#3 Being a Lazy Witch
I know that proper magic is a shit load of work. I’ve been doing it for over 20 years. At times, I’ve been lazy about it. You know what? Effort = results.
Stop: If you’re just not that into it, maybe you don’t want to do it all. Or is there something bigger going on? Try doing a small working well rather than claiming you are lazy. Seriously. I can’t even believe this is a trendy thing to say.
#2: The Gospel Truth
The “my way or the highway” mentality. This attitude is condescending to others, but what it really does is prevent us from growing. Those with a fixed mindset can be spewing what they’ve learned blindly from their masters or shouting dogma of their own creation. Taking anything as the gospel truth is incredibly un-witchy.
Stop: Critical thinking skills are incredibly magical. Ask yourself what is it you are accepting and why. Don’t tell others that they are doing it wrong unless there is a real risk of harm.
#1: Giving Away Your Power
We all have demands on our energy, from work to partners and everything in between. Here’s the thing: the witches serves no one. I learned that tidbit a couple of decades ago. Whatever is going on, you can remain sovereign.
Stop: Work on developing better mundane and magical boundaries. You can refer to my list here.
That’s my list of 13 bad habits that all of us witches need to break right now. Let me know what ones I’ve missed.
Geology of the Soul (www.geologyofthesoul.com) founder and Mystai mentor, Angie Brown Knight-Reiter recently wrote about witch envy, the witch’s shadow syndrome, and how to stay focused on your own story (https://www.geologyofthesoul.com/blog/2019/7/28/witch-envy-the-second-most-asked-question-i-get).
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