Curses!

Just got this in the mail:

We regret to inform you that your morally inexplicable disapproval of torture has resulted in your being expelled from the Society of Evil Overlords. Please divide your lickspittle lackeys inequitably among the Evil Overlords in your area, and immediately turn in your black cloak, as well as any devices you may employ to cast fear into the mindless minions. Your storm troopers are not eligible for unemployment benefits, as their predicament is entirely their own fault; they should have foreseen that you would end up being expelled from the Society.

Insincerely,

Screwtape

Hel-LO!? Haven’t you people ever heard of a “signature trait” that marks me off as a Dark Lord with a difference? You know: “Hitler liked dogs”, “Vlad Tepes liked to listen to beautiful music while he impaled his foes”, that sort of thing? My opposition to torture is one of my *charming eccentricities* that humanize me while I ruthlessly plot world domination. It sets me apart from the herd of Dark Lord wannabes and also-rans who are, like, kill kill kill torture torture torture. BO-RING!

What *are* those clowns at the Society of Evil Overlords *doing* at the weekly meetings anyway? Note to self: perhaps the time has come to liquidate this particular ball and chain on my designs for POWER–ABSOLUTE POWER, BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!!!!