Should I seek a new therapist?

I feel frustrated in therapy, like I go there, tell about my week, and then go home. That’s something I can do with anyone. I’m looking for goals and assignments and maybe some tips on how to deal with my circling thoughts and anxiety attacks . . . frustrating. I asked my doctor about it and she said that these things take time. So should I seek a new therapist or keep telling my current one about my week? It already takes an enormous effort to get myself there though it’s only a few minutes away. I don’t know if I can handle looking for a new one. Sigh.

As one who is involved in a therapy process, it is important to remember that you are the customer. And as the customer you have certain rights. For example, the right to find the process valuable, the right to voice complaints or concerns, the right to be part of the treatment plan (what are we working on and how do we get there), and the right to terminate therapy. Psychotherapy in of itself has a hard time “proving” its efficacy because it is such an individualized process with so many unique factors involved in each person’s case – not to mention the myriad of different types of therapy available. However, over time it has been studied, researched, and found to be an overall effective and productive means of providing relief, treatment, education, relationship skills and better quality of life for its constituents. So much so, that therapy is covered by insurance companies and considered a branch of the medical profession.

Here are some recommendations:

• Talk directly to your therapist about your concerns, needs and things you feel would be helpful within the therapeutic context. If your therapist does not agree or does not take your concerns into consideration then you might want to consider finding a new one.
• You may want to look for a therapist who uses a “solution-focused” approach. These therapists are usually goal-centered, use assignments, focus on the future rather than your past, etc. It sounds like this might be more your style.
• More and more therapists are providing sessions via a telephone or teleconferencing venue. The efficacy of this type of therapy is still under research, but the preliminary findings are showing that it can be especially useful for people who are dealing with depression and/or anxiety. Reason being is that part of the symptoms for these types of disorders make it difficult for one to find the energy, motivation and or courage to physically go into an office on a weekly basis.
• Don’t give up on therapy all together. Although it can be a frustrating process to find the right therapist for you, even possibly through multiple tries, the right therapist can be an incredible resource and life-altering part of your treatment plan.

So much of having a successful therapy experience is tied into whether or not you feel comfortable, safe, validated, heard and understood by your therapist. This is called “joining.” Without this therapeutic bond, your chances of getting the results you are looking for diminish significantly. Research study after study has shown that the client-therapist bond is much more important in ultimate success than any one methodology or treatment approach. I wish you the best of luck in this journey you are on.

Check out my previous post on a similar topic:
What is therapy supposed to be about?

Also, these tips on depression-help-resource.com might be useful:
Tips for finding a therapist that’s right for you