The transition to wearing hijab full-time can be a difficult one for many women. We often have internal and external barriers which prevent us from feeling totally comfortable and confident in the hijab. It can be a confusing time. Here are 3 mistakes to avoid as a new hijabi, which may help make the transition easier:
This is a common pitfall which people are susceptible to in any area of life, but when it comes to religion, it can cause a lot of damage. Women often have the misconception that once they put on the hijab, they need to be perfect Muslims.
Some of this comes from society’s stereotypes and unfair expectations, but a lot of it comes from our own self-judgment. It is also due to the whispers of Shaytan, who tells us that we are not good enough for the hijab if we are doing X or not doing Y. But Allah (swt) warns us not to fall for this trap. Shaytan just wants to convince us that we are not good enough for the hijab so that we will take it off, and then it will be one less good deed being recorded for us. He wants us to be distanced from Allah and will try to make that happen at all costs.
Feeling Pressured to Conform
This is something that every person feels in some way, and hijabis are no exception. Many times, women say that one thing they like about the hijab is how it makes them feel strong and unique, because they are not conforming to society’s norms. Society expects them to dress one way, and they are dressing in a totally different way rather than buckling to the pressure. And that’s awesome.
However, even among hijabis, there is pressure to fit a certain image. Long tops or maxi dresses? Loose pants or skinny jeans? Scarf draped low or worn turban-style? Hair showing at the front or all tucked in?
Don’t let anyone else define your style. Hijab should make you feel beautiful, confident, and secure in your deen. And remember that it is, first and foremost, a means of growing closer to our Creator by obeying Him. Although it can be worn fashionably to some extent, it is not meant to be a fashion statement.
Losing Your Identity
I know that deciding to wear the hijab is a huge decision, and sticking with it takes courage. But it definitely shouldn’t be the only thing that defines us after we put it on, which is how society sometimes makes us feel. Women who wear hijab are still just like anyone else in that they have specific interests and certain likes and dislikes.
One of the complaints I have heard most from new hijabis and former hijabis is that they just didn’t feel like themselves anymore after starting to wear the hijab. But it doesn’t need to be this way. You don’t need to change yourself or your behavior beyond what’s strictly required by the deen. Don’t forget that just because you wear the hijab now, it doesn’t mean that you can’t still be yourself and keep your personality.
Everything I shared here is just based on my own experience, but I do think it’s best to avoid these 3 mistakes. I also want to hear from others: If you have been wearing the hijab for some time now, what is your advice to new hijabis?
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