I often tease my husband about suffering from Tim Allen syndrome. He thinks bigger, louder, faster equals better. There is nothing I want that can’t be improved upon.
I used to get annoyed and think that he just didn’t listen to me. It occurred to me that perhaps he didn’t think I was smart enough to know what I really wanted. I just couldn’t understand what was so hard about getting precisely what I asked for. I go to great pains to be specific, only to be a bit dumbfounded and befuddled when I open the box.
Today, for instance, I had asked for a bigger jewelry box to put the pieces I’m beginning to collect. After years of not wearing any jewelry at all, I finally am dressing a little better, and I need somewhere to put things. The Computer Guy beamed with nervous pride as he handed me an ugly gray lock box of a size appropriate for fishing tackle. I must have looked disappointed or something, because he went on to hastily explain that it was large enough for all my jewelry and our important documents, too.
I shook my head in disbelief. I wanted a pretty wooden box to put on the counter in the dressing area of our bathroom, and he gives me a hideous metal thing to put in my closet. Did he not listen?
This evening, I realized that he may not listen, but he does pay attention. He hears me complain about children getting into my things and wanted me to have a key so that I could lock my things away from little hands. He sees his wife take pride in her appearance and wants her to be able to keep all those pretty things safe. He doesn’t understand tangled necklaces or lost earrings, he knows that he loves me and wants to keep the things I value safe, so he gave me a safe.
It may not be what I asked him for, but it is a perfect reflection of the way he loves me. He loves me enough to value the things I value, to want for me all that I want and then some and for me to dream big. All I wanted was a place to put things, but he gave me a place to keep them. Love doesn’t get any better than that.