A Masterclass in Breaking Bad News

A Masterclass in Breaking Bad News October 25, 2024

George Shamblin is today’s guest blogger. He is a pastor, teacher, and published author who has been on staff at The Center since 2012. He is passionate about discipling men and helping them wrestle with what it means to be a Christian and a man in today’s world. George is releasing his new book, The Four Faces of Christ. I hope you’ll give it a read. Thank you, George for this timely message. —Richard

*****

A college freshman, Tim, was dreading the call home to his parents. Ever since he’d enrolled, things hadn’t been going as planned, and now he had to break the news.

“Hey, Mom, can you put me on speaker? I need to talk to you and Dad about something important.”

Immediately, his parents could sense the worry in his voice. His mom asked, “Tim, what’s wrong? You sound serious.”

Tim took a deep breath and began. “Well, it’s been a really tough semester, and … something happened. I was driving my Land Cruiser last week, and I kinda … wrecked it. Smashed right into the front door of a Zaxby’s.”

There was a gasp on the other end. His dad’s voice came through, strained. “What?! Are you okay? How bad was the accident?”

“Well,” Tim continued, “I’m not hurt, but that’s not the worst part. I, uh, Zaxby’s is planning to sue us. Or I guess to be specific, they’re going to sue you.”

His mom let out a loud gasp, and his dad, now almost shouting, asked, “Tim, what in the world?! What is going on with you?!”

“Well, there’s one more thing you need to know. The manager wouldn’t stop yelling, so I started cussing him out, big time, which, unfortunately, was caught on video and airs tonight on the local news.”

Tim paused for dramatic effect, almost long enough for steam to release from his parents’ ears.

Tim continued talking with what appeared to be a tangent, “Here’s what I’m learning at college, like in my Freshman Psychology class, and how everything has to do with perspective, you know? I’m discovering how bad things don’t seem so bad when stacked up against worse things. That’s how our world works.”

A long, confused silence followed.

“The point is, I didn’t wreck the car, you’re not getting sued, and I’m not going to be on TV tonight. But … I did get a D in my chemistry class.”

His parents, still stunned, exhaled loudly in unison.

For a moment, there was just silence. Then, his mom, who had been on the verge of tears a moment before, spoke first: “You got a D? That’s it?”

His dad, still processing, added, “Son, why in the world would you scare us like that?”

Tim smiled on his end of the phone, relieved. “I figured the D wouldn’t sound so bad after everything else.”

And, strangely, it didn’t. Compared to what they had just imagined—medical bills, car repairs, life-altering consequences—a D seemed like a minor bump in the road. His parents, still recovering from the mental rollercoaster, eventually laughed, realizing how Tim had masterfully managed to soften the blow of the news they were originally dreading.

I had a cruddy day this past Sunday and felt sad and blue all over. I sensed God’s Spirit leading me to look back over three instances when I got rattled beyond belief. During those past seasons, every glimmer of hope had vanished like a fleeting vapor, which felt particularly injurious since hope is supposed to be an essential staple of our faith. The guilt and shame just kept piling on. For anyone reading this, you’ve entered those sorrowful places, too. And although they may look different than mine, they’re no less painful.

When I momentarily glanced back at those troublesome times, it was a good exercise in perspective that got me back on track in three neat ways. I trust that sharing them may make an impact on you as well. So here they are:

1st – “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” Romans 8:18   Can a more triumphant verse in a more triumphant chapter of Scripture be found?

2nd – “Therefore, humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you … After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you. 1 Peter 5:6-7; 10

3rd – During World War II, the term “triage” was first used as a policy for providing medical assistance. It was up to the doctors to “color-tag” the wounded, placing them in one of three categories according to their condition. One color meant hopeless – nothing we can do will save them. Another tag meant they’d make it whether they get help or not. The third color-tag indicated a doubtful prognosis – a chance to live only if medical assistance is given. Since there were severely limited medical supplies, assistance was being given only to this last group.

What I love most about the Good News is this, and it continues to breathe fresh wind into my soul: The Gospel is plentiful enough to treat all of our ailments, no matter how dire, whether it’s an actual car crash or falling short in an area of your life that feels like a “D” or “F.” Everything falls into place according to our Lord’s plan, rendering color coding, such as in triage, obsolete.”

Jesus said, for those who have ears to hear, let them hear.


Browse Our Archives