Gregorian Colander

Gregorian Colander August 10, 2015

A major error in the history of religion was rectified recently when Pastafarians released a photo, which provided evidence that religions were supposed to adhere to the Gregorian colander, not the Gregorian calendar

Ancient colender

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  • ccws


  • Notice that the firmament, in this ancient depiction, is most certainly a dome.

    • Paul E.

      Curses. I was going to make this joke. 🙁

      • It’s a James McGrath blog – the joke was inevitable.

    • And the windows of heaven are small enough to let water rain on us, yet keep the delicious pasta from escaping Earth and flowing to the heavens…or something like that.

      • Phil Ledgerwood

        The Flood was God washing some blueberries.

  • Sixtus

    I await the Last Day when the noodles are at last reunited with the waters, or broth, rather, as described in the book of Ramenalation.

    • Sixtus

      Otherwise known in Norse mythology as Pastadammerung.

      • ccws


        • Please, please, someone make an artistic depiction of Ramengnarok!

    • Gary

      And the Lord said, “On the Sixth Minute, when the Noodle is Al Dente…”
      (But forget not this one thing, beloved, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand minutes, and a thousand minutes as one day – actually 1,440, but everyone knows it is symbolic).
      Commentaries emphasize that Al Dente refers to the noodles on the sixth minute, not Adam.

  • ccws

    It also occurs to me that this device would be handy for straining the gnats out of your camel soup.

    • I would love to see an ad for a pharisaic strainer – removes gnats, leaves camels behind!