Are you interested in homeschooling your child but worry that they are a special case? Maybe they have hated school or even refused to go, and you are looking for an alternative. If they are on the autism spectrum, they have special interests. And if school doesn’t fit into those interests, it will be harder for them to engage. I’ve been there. And I have great news for you- there is a way for your child to love learning, succeed in life, and get a good education. But it may not be what you are expecting.
Homeschool is not a classroom
When we started our Homeschool journey, I tried to recreate a classroom in my home. That was a big mistake. My son had a lot of trauma from the classrooms he had been in previously. Not just normal issues, he had a bad case of anxiety-based School Refusal. (I talk about that journey here and here, if you want to know more.) We couldn’t connect, there was no spark in his eyes, and he lost interest in lessons quickly. So I shifted to sitting together on the couch, reading books. It was only marginally better that way. Looking back, I wish I had some guidance on how to make the needed shift, so I’m going to share my secrets.
First, I had to throw everything I had known about a classroom out the window. You are homeschooling; embrace the uniqueness of your situation. Use your home, yard, neighborhood, contacts, and community to find ways to give your kids new skills and experiences. Get an aquarium membership, aviary membership, children’s museum membership, or zoo membership. Visit petting zoos and any venue that is kid-friendly.
Go to the park often and arrange play dates. Make use of your local library’s programs. We loved story hour. Most libraries in our area post a calendar of events on their website. That makes it makes it easy to plan visits. Several libraries now have 3D printers. That was where my son had his first experience with a 3D printer. We enjoyed it so much that we decided to get one of our own and take classes with it.
Plan lots of breaks
Remember that the school day is much longer than it needs to be. Kids are at school an average of 7 hours a day. And there is no way any kid is going to sit down and focus for 7 hours. We usually completed our basic learning in an hour a day, and we always took breaks. The fun learning would start afterward. And because every kid who is on the Autism Spectrum and has a special interest will become an expert, that is where my son started having the most fun.
This is the magic formula- learning and inspiration are everywhere! Observing the world around you is a great learning tool. I remember watching the delight on my son’s face as he discovered elephants. We spent hours watching them at the zoo. And there is always a way to connect concepts to subjects with a little creativity. Math, science, creative writing, art, and even social skills can be connected to any interest.
Use their interest to help overcome obstacles
I taught my son how to become fluent in conversations at car washes. He had a million questions about soap ratios and the running processes of each wash. So I would come with him and we would find the owner of the wash. I introduced us and let my son do the talking. At first, I needed to help direct the conversations. But as he grew, he became more confident. And now at 16, he doesn’t even need me to come with him. He is fluent in conversation and in car washes, and enjoys talking to the owners. Now he is comfortable having conversations with just about anyone.
At one point, he became obsessed with starting his own YouTube channel. He wanted to review car washes and inform people how they worked. There are a lot of educational benefits to knowing about video production, sound, and lighting. I even studied it for a while in college. So we started a channel. It was a lot of fun to see him blossom as he shared his love of car washes with the world.
I also used his interests to guide behavior. We had non-preferred activities followed by his favorite activities. That way, he would have something to look forward to. And often that preferred activity was enough of a motivator to get him to leave the house when he wouldn’t otherwise. One more blessing of every car wash- they aren’t at home.
Mindset matters
One of the little-known issues with homeschooling is your mindset. I was so focused on the way I had been taught in a classroom environment from kindergarten to a bachelor’s degree. So I looked for some professional help. I had my son evaluated to learn his learning style. And I got coaching on how to homeschool from Laura Garn, an amazing graduate of the Life Coach School. Her insights helped me gain the confidence to homeschool. Paired with knowing my son’s learning style, I could confidently plan for success.
Not everyone would include prayer in their success plans, but I included it in mine. I prayed over my son, over the topics and activities we were going to do, and begged for guidance. Sometimes the prayers led me in different directions than I had intended. And I was blessed when I followed the guidance of the Spirit. Remember, your child is God’s child first. And He knows them better than you do, and knows what they need to grow. Partnering with my Heavenly Father as I homeschooled built my faith and brought us closer together as a family.
We are finally experiencing success with homeschooling, and it looks remarkably different from my traditional schooling. I let my son lead our learning based on his interests at the time. Autism comes with the ability to hyper-focus on your interests, so school is a breeze when you find that sweet spot. We have homeschooled around video games, Xbox consoles, computers, car washes, fire alarms, and robot vacuums.
Use every tool at your disposal
Right now, he loves fire alarms, which is perfect. We use multi-modal learning, meaning we explore subjects in as many ways as possible. We watch videos, do hands-on projects, read, and go out into the world to see things “in the wild”. That has been a game changer. Over time, I have let my son guide his schedule. He has so many resources that I will ask him what he studied that day, and I am amazed by his answers.
Even when we are out doing errands, he is taking pictures of the fire alarms on the walls in public places. He has gotten to the point where he can identify the brand and model of each device on site. And this summer, he has a job as an assistant fire alarm tech. He saw the sticker on one of the fire extinguishers at our church. And he called the company and eventually got an interview. He has been working there ever since.
Remember your end goals
I am so proud of my son’s progress. He still needs to build his confidence in some areas. But he has come so far. Homeschooling based on his special interests has been the key to making the pieces fit and the information stick. Today, I witnessed the upper management asking my son questions about fire alarms he knows inside and out. They were trying to solve a problem, and he was able to help. It was a beautiful moment when I saw all his hard work paying off.
My son’s special interests may be unusual. But letting him build his education around them has enhanced his learning and strengthened his knowledge base for what he already loved. I knew he would be an expert in his areas of choice, but getting to see the process and see how he can make a career of it, well, that warms my heart. It’s what every parent wants- to know their child is happy and set up for success. And since parenthood is a divine gift.
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