I have many, many things to say about the news of the past week. I don’t know how I can even do it justice here in blog posts of two thousand words or less. I am not a person who believes in being simplistic about things that aren’t simple.
But there are a few things I need to say right off the bat.
If anyone reading this was conceived in rape, or in incest, or in an abusive relationship that was hell on your mother: I am sorry that you keep hearing what amounts to “it would be better if you hadn’t been born” right now. I am glad that you’re alive, and I believe you’re here for a reason, and I believe you have infinite dignity as a human person. I cannot explain the horrors human beings commit against one another. I don’t have some cute platitude that can make it all better. But you’re never guilty for what someone else did.
The same for anyone who is disabled or chronically ill and has been made to feel like a burden at some point in your life– which, realistically speaking, I think all of us who are disabled or chronically ill have. I am sorry that you keep hearing it would be better if you’d never been born. Our lives are worth living too. We’re not burdens to society, we’re people who bring different gifts, and I’m sorry for any way your gifts have been rejected or treated like curses just because they come with extra work. I’m glad you’re alive.
The same for anyone who grew up in foster care, or in terrible poverty, or who was abused as a child. You’ve had a very tough time. I’m sorry you suffered and I admire the way you fought and survived.
If you have had a special-needs baby and are being made to feel guilty about not aborting by the way people are talking all over the internet– thank you for being a mother. Thank you for caring so much about your child. I know I can’t imagine the unique difficulties of your situation, but I admire you. Please don’t feel guilty. Your child’s life matters.
And if you have had or considered abortion, if you’ve had a miscarriage, if you’ve had an ectopic pregnancy, if you had a traumatic pregnancy and childbirth, if you feel like you’d rather die than get pregnant again and all the talk in the news and online is triggering flashbacks and terror: believe me, I understand at least a little. I’m terrified to live in this country right now. You are a strong person even though you don’t feel like it. Your experience matters. You don’t deserve to be thrown in prison and I’m outraged on your behalf that any of these laws might put any of us in danger just for being women.
I’ll be back on line later tonight with more to say, but I want to get that out of the way first of all. You matter, your life has value, your experience has meaning, your fears are not foolish.
In that light, we can begin a discussion.
(image via Pixabay)
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