We went to the beach with my bad cousins. This was the time directly after the infamous Once Upon A Potty Smiting of which I’ve already written. My cousins were still impulsive and “too worldly;” we were still repressed, but that made us all the more impulsive when we had impulsive company. Their parents and mine, along with my grandmother, all split the cost of renting a cottage on Pawley’s Island for a week. We lived in land-locked Ohio. “Going to the... Read more
Lately, I’ve had to get used to a harsh-voiced woman standing outside my house at seven o’clock in the morning, screaming “KARMA!!!” I suffer from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, among other things. When you have CFS, it’s very easy to drowse all day, but it’s difficult to actually sleep and get the rest you so desperately need. I go through regular cycles where lie awake until early morning, listening to my heart beat. I’ve learned not to try to fight it by... Read more
Author’s note: According to Sandra Boynton, today is Science Fiction Day. I decided to try and write a sneaky science fiction story that isn’t really very scientific, but at any rate it’s fiction. All persons trying to find a moral in it will be drug out into space and zapped. “Are we going to Polaris?” asked the old woman across the aisle. “Yes,” I said. “Polaris is the last stop.” Why anyone would want to get off the bus on Polaris... Read more
Here are some things it might be nice to say when somebody dies: –That’s terrible! –How sad. –I’m very sorry for your loss. –It will pray for them. [But this one is only nice if you know the bereaved’s beliefs and you know they wouldn’t be offended by that]. –[The deceased] was such a wonderful person. –I remember when [share xyz happy memory of the deceased]. –What, if anything, can we do to help you? –When will the funeral service... Read more
One thing I’ve learned in all my years: if someone tells you they’re a “remnant” of something, they’re lying. Usually to themselves. Everyone who thinks they’re the last Orthodox Catholics or the last Bible Believing Protestants or the last People Who Know How To Make Black Forest Cake are being self-aggrandizing and dishonest. If a piece of fabric rises out of the leftovers bin at Jo-Ann Fabric and claims to be a remnant, expect to pay full price for it. It’s lying... Read more
It started on December 26th, as it always does. There was good-natured controversy all over my Facebook, between friends of both the Eastern and Western Catholic stripe, about how long the Christmas tree should stay up. There were memes about it; I shared some myself. There were statuses and comments offering correction. I find that, whenever there is good-natured controversy, there will inevitably be people taking the controversy very seriously. Some people are certain they’ve got the One Right Answer... Read more
Giant pandas were taken off the endangered species list this year. I know, I know, we’ve been through so much in 2016. And technically speaking, since pandas are in China, this didn’t happen in 2016 but in the Chinese year 4714. But still– while we were cursing 2016, the lovable snuggly cow bear was taken off the endangered species list. Thanks be to God. And in June of this year, the WHO declared that the ebola pandemic was over. Thanks be... Read more
Some of you may have heard that Dan Miller, the director of an outfit calling itself Prolife Wisconsin, posted an offensive meme on his public facebook page, mocking the tragic death of Carrie Fisher, on the very day that Fisher’s mother died of grief. I’ll let Mark Shea tell you all about it.  Miller used the hashtag #thismighthurtsome to add an extra flippancy to his remark. Miller has removed the post but has not apologized, and thus far everyone who messages him asking... Read more
Somewhere along the line, I bought into the escapist fantasy that a large number of small containers would keep my daughter’s play room organized. I blame the Berenstain Bears for this. The Berenstain Bears were a mainstay of my childhood; my father always stopped at the library on the way home from work, and he would usually bring home a VHS tape and a stack of children’s books. There was nearly always a bright volume of the interminable Berenstain Bears... Read more
Yesterday, the Western Church celebrated the martyrdom of Saint Stephen. Today, it’s our turn in the East. Here, we see a tenth century painting of the event, from the Menologion of Basil II.  There’s Saint Stephen, who just saw the Son of Man standing at the Right Hand of God, on his knees on the sand, bleeding from a head wound and supplicating for his murderers. There’s the aforementioned Right Hand of God reaching down from above the firmament and receiving his... Read more
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