is singleness a vocation…

… I hear this question every now and then. I wonder, but highly doubt it.

I’m not a consecrated single person so being single, in my opinion, is not a vocation. I just sort of ended up in this state through various life circumstances but I never actively sought to be single. I think most singles are like me in this aspect. When I think “vocation” I don’t think of some transitory or temporary state, which I hope and pray my singleness is.

So I ascertain that being an unconsecrated single person is not a vocation though it is not a state without merit. When lived in accordance to our faith, singleness can help one attain holiness. It has certainly forced a greater dependency on God in my own life.

We often hear the old Catholic war cry, offer it up… which even on a good day still sounds like the dismissing retort, suck it up. Similarly, telling a single person to embrace their state of life is just as ineffective, especially since it’s not a state we’ve chosen.

The thought that gets me through most days is thinking of singleness as a sort of earthbound purgatory or limbo… a constant state of waiting. Surely all this waiting about is good for my patience and humility… surely.

Related link: Is the Unconsecrated Single Life a Vocation

Lady at Eden Concert, Picasso 1903