Why God, why, would you allow this to happen…

… The thing about vodka, good vodka, is that it shouldn’t have a taste. That is what makes vodka such a wonderful, glorious thing. You can mix it with other alcohols or put it in just about everything – like Slurpees and Cherry Berry Chillers. Vodka is not supposed to have flavors like marshamllow, birthday cake, and s’mores. It’s unnatural. Unholy. A sacrilege!

If you have to do this unspeakably vile thing to vodka then perhaps you shouldn’t be drinking alcohol at all. Why would anyone do such a thing to Vodka? Pure, innocent Vodka. It makes the heart weep.