I started thinking the other day about things like: Baptism of Children Confirmation of Children Vacation Bible School It led me to some questions: Are they really old enough to commit for life to our belief system that they probably, don’t understand? How many different worldviews have they been exposed to this early in life? Won’t they be shamed if they abandon this belief system later in life? Aren’t we forcing them into something before they can realistically decide for... Read more
Laura and I watched this series over the past few days. It was an intense depiction of a true-life story. At times it was hard to watch as it brought up memories of the past. The natural defense is that not all LDS saints are like this, just like all Catholic priests and Southern Baptist youth pastors don’t molest children. The “our church is not like that” defense causes us to bypass the issues. First of all, we all have... Read more
Cover by Rafael Polendo Several years ago, I went through what most people call a deconstruction of some of my religious beliefs. It started as moving from a fundamentalist, evangelical system to a more Christ-like, less retributive view of God. I first compared my beliefs about God to my experience as a parent. I wrote a book called Apparent Faith: What Fatherhood Taught Me About the Father’s Heart. It became a journal of my journey through deconstruction, and I was... Read more
Photo by Ryutaro Tsukata: https://www.pexels.com/photo/small-jizo-on-grassy-ground-6249742/My personality is easily frustrated. I imagine things could be better than what they are. I hope for people to treat me better, and when they don’t, I often become disappointed and/or angry. I long to accomplish things, and even before I finish one project, I’m thinking about the next. I’ve written about seven books in the last 5 years, two of them are not even published yet. I think I had somewhat of a breakthrough... Read more
As much as we would hate to admit it, most of our lives are totally governed by fear. We also know that, because of this, people are easily able to sell us what they want to sell us. The two primary avenues they take are through religion and politics. Like a good salesperson, preachers and politicians play on our fears to sell us who we should vote for and where we should send our money. Before you dismiss it as... Read more
(This is a guest post by my friend, Kyle Butler) About a year or so ago, I started the incredibly difficult work of going within myself, to not only find myself, but to also heal myself. I also wanted to gain an understanding as to why certain unwanted behaviors had become prevalent in my life. This was hard. It was very hard. There were many, many very dark days and very dark nights. Many moments of feeling as if “what’s... Read more
First of all, I’m not sure if disabled is the right word, I’ve been busy the last 6 months trying to recover from my stroke. They tell me I’m doing very well, but it doesn’t feel that way. I have no speech issues or cognitive impairments, but I don’t move so fast and my left arm is still quite impaired. Overall, people have been encouraging. They have donated money, called us regularly in some cases, and were generally encouraging. As... Read more
Laura and I wrote a book a couple of years ago called, Out into the Desert: Thriving Outside Organized Religion. One of the topics we explore in this book, that will be released soon, is the idea that religion creates an addiction. Religion is designed to appeal to our emotions and make us feel “good.” If you told me “I like going to church,” I wouldn’t have a problem believing you. Worship services are designed to make you feel good,... Read more
Bullies don’t always look like the chubby kid with the low self-esteem that tries to steal our lunch money. Sometimes the bully looks like a grandmother with a southern drawl that says “bless your heart” in front of a lot of people to shame you for doing something she disagrees with. Sometimes bullying looks like a pastor that ends an impassioned sentence with “Amen?” or “wouldn’t you agree?” to force you to comply. Sometimes it’s the person at the farmers... Read more
I try to keep my writing as succinct as possible. So this blog is an attempt to take it to a new level. I’m not a fan of organized religion. As succinctly as possible. I will try to explain. 1. Religion has no room for our grief. It promises to help us, it intends to help us, but because it’s an organization, it cannot. 2. Most of the money and resources are wasted. 70% of its income goes to building... Read more
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