The Problem with Mercy

Last updated on: September 5, 2021 at 6:14 am By Karl J. Forehand

Early in my Christian experience I was taught about mercy. We even learned the difference between grace and mercy. I used to explain it this way: Grace is getting something we don’t deserve, and mercy is not getting what we deserve. Mercy is generally understood to be the relief from punishment that we deserve because we are all sinners and miss the mark of God’s standard. Even though the Bible never really taught eternal conscious torment, the message has become progressively prevalent... Read more

Leaning Forward

Last updated on: September 9, 2021 at 6:15 pm By Karl J. Forehand

October 16th – Online – Free – Reserve a Spot History and Purpose: Last year, the Desert Sanctuary initiated the Nomad 2020 online conference during the pandemic. Ever since that day, I have been dreaming of this event. I wanted to lean forward and look toward the future with all the other spiritual nomads and seekers. I wanted to bring together people with differing vantage points to see if we could see what is over the horizon. To be... Read more

Evolving Out of Fear-based Parenting – 2 of 2

Last updated on: August 21, 2021 at 4:17 am By Karl J. Forehand

Yesterday, I talked about how I started to evolve out of fear-based parenting. Usually my bad decisions were rooted in fear. If you haven’t read it yet, go back and read it now – part 1. But, through all our struggles we managed to discover a few things that we did right. Learning to be Brave My dad never learned to swim. My grandpa is a person I am connected with spiritually in some strange metaphysical way. I can literally... Read more

Evolving Out of Fear-based Parenting – 1 of 2

Last updated on: August 20, 2021 at 3:24 pm By Karl J. Forehand

I was kneeling down over a flower bed when I noticed my daughter standing next to me. She was poised like she wanted to talk, so I just sat back on the grass. Lily was facing me directly with her hands on her hips, and then, she let me have it! For a few years, I had been telling people that I was paddling my man boat through the estrogen sea, because I had two teenage daughters and I had... Read more

Why Churches Generally Don’t Heal our Trauma

Last updated on: August 19, 2021 at 5:34 pm By Karl J. Forehand

Before we even get started, let me just say this. I know that many of you might have had good experiences with your church. It’s better than a fundamentalist, evangelical church that you know of and you are more accepting, affirming and generally more progressive. I get that–there is a church like that across the street. If it didn’t trigger us because of our trauma, we would probably attend there. I hope Pastor Donna is reading. I am not saying... Read more

I Don’t Want to be “Properly Formed”

Last updated on: July 31, 2021 at 6:39 am By Karl J. Forehand

Spiritual formation means different things to different streams of faith. Some have more stringent programs and processes to confirm learners to their understanding of spirituality while others might call it discipleship or disciple-making. Most belief systems have some process to form their disciples into a more cohesive group that believes and understands the same things about God and how the world works. I come from a tradition that called it discipleship and every Tom, Dick and Harry had an idea how to do that. They incorporated... Read more

Guest Post – Parts of Me

Last updated on: July 27, 2021 at 5:47 pm By Karl J. Forehand

by Laura Forehand Being a Mimi is one of the quintessential joys of my life. This season began with me four years ago with the birth of our first grandchild, Hollyn. About the same time, ironically, I began my deconstruction journey from church, religion, evangelicalism, and God. With that deconstruction came hours of focusing sessions with Dr. Paul Fitzgerald and hundreds of hours of real and raw conversations with my husband Karl. Much of my focusing has to do with... Read more

Letting Go

Last updated on: July 25, 2021 at 7:31 am By Karl J. Forehand

I think I inherited my inner hoarder from my mother and I think she got if from her depression-era ancestors. Something in us tends to be afraid that we will need those things somewhere down the road. I have a few pallets of stuff in the garage that I haven’t looked at or touched since we moved here 5 years ago. I assume, it must be important because we expended the energy to drag it along from our previous address,... Read more

Being Brave

Last updated on: July 24, 2021 at 7:15 am By Karl J. Forehand

It is probably true that mot of what we teach our children is by the example we set. It seems they watch us more than they hear us, and actions do speak louder than words. But, if we are intentional and we provide a good example, we may even teach them something that we intended to in the this big ole’ crazy world (reference to John Prine). For me, one of the primary lessons I wanted my children to learn... Read more

“You’re Still Cool”

Last updated on: July 24, 2021 at 6:20 pm By Karl J. Forehand

My wife, Laura Forehand, is a very experienced teacher and competent in Whole Brain Teaching. It’s a classroom management methodology that is very effective at engaging the student and making the learning environment effective. She learned it one summer by reading the book by Chris Biffle called “Whole Brain Teaching for Challenging Kids. If you want more information, the best place to start might be the Facebook Page or the website. I always ask Laura if I can come to class with her... Read more

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