November 18, 2018

I think they live in the past here. A large comfy city built of small neighborhoods all standing on one another’s heads. They call them barrios. I’ve heard stories of that in America, when bars and pastry shops and churches were two to a block, sitting on top of each other. But now we have shopping malls.   Eyes are fantasy stories here. I’ve heard stories of men and women who had eyes of lavender and silver grey gold and... Read more

November 15, 2018

  I’ve been thinking about witches since autumn began.   I never much liked or even thought of witches in the past. I grew up celebrating All Hallow’s Eve rather than Halloween. My friends and I would dress as saints rather than demons and have plenty of innocent fun. We truly did enjoy ourselves, as odd as it may sound. There were homemade donuts (¨Soul Cakes¨) and hay wagon rides in the dark and dancing to Christian parodies of classic... Read more

October 16, 2018

    Jessica Mesman Griffith has got me started on a horror binge recently.   Horror is never my go to genre. I prefer to maintain my ability to sleep, thankyouverymuch (at night and at all other random and unusual times of the day, too). But I’ve been dealing with some particularly difficult anxiety lately. (You mean moving to a foreign country, with a very different time zone and different eating times and a new language and a new job... Read more

October 12, 2018

  Where were you, He asked me, when my little ones came to you, broken, bruised, violated? I was the Administrator, I replied. I did what was best for the school. Where were you, He asked me, when their hands were shaking and clenched, their breaths tight and hard in their chest, and you chided them for their emotion? I was the Administrator, I replied. I had to keep them under control. Where were you, He asked me, when they... Read more

September 17, 2018

Hi y’all. No, I’m not dead yet. Yes, I’ve been a horrible blogger for nearly two full months.   So I wanted to check in. I made it to Spain two weeks ago (after exhibiting Herculean efforts to get my Visa this summer!). I’m living in the suburbs of Zaragoza, a very comfortable city about the size of Pittsburgh, PA. And I’m stayings with a very welcoming Spanish family. (The father is a pro-soccer coach who used to play pro,... Read more

July 26, 2018

  Editor’s note: At The Shoeless Banshee we have published some strong women’s responses (here and here) to Lori Alexander’s post “Men Prefer Debt-Free Virgins without Tattoos” from her blog, The Transformed Wife. However, I was curious to get a man’s perspective on this controversy, so I invited some respected friends to weigh in.   Dear Aggie,   I know you’re not old enough to use the internet yet, but one day you will be. And someday you may come... Read more

July 25, 2018

  ***Trigger Warning–Self-Harm***   My first tattoo was my golden birthday present to myself (when I turned 25 on the 25th) after struggling with a bout of self-harm temptations. It was all I could do to keep myself away from the razor in my bathroom. I listened to NF’s “Therapy Session” on repeat for hours, watching the music video and letting the reality of the memories of abuse, self-hatred, and paralyzing fear wash over me in cathartic tears and numbing... Read more

July 22, 2018

  *UPDATE* Dr. Jack Barto, the pediatrician who molested me as a child and later demeaned and mistreated me as a teenager, has been arrested on 70 counts of child abuse and molestation. Today I called the Attorney General’s hotline for the victims of Dr. Barto and reported my own experience of his abuse. The number is (412) 565-7680. I encourage you to call if you also suffered at the hands of this pedophile.   Around midnight a few nights ago I... Read more

July 20, 2018

  Yesterday an image showed up in my Facebook newsfeed: overlaid in front of a lovely young white woman with perfectly wavy blond hair were the words “Men Prefer Debt-Free Virgins without Tattoos.”   The image came from a Facebook page, The Transformed Wife, belonging to Lori Alexander. Apparently this image links to a blog post, but I didn’t even realize that until I read Samantha Field’s phenomenal response tonight, “Men Prefer Uneducated, Naïve Objects They Can Easily Control.”  ... Read more

July 19, 2018

  Grace scares me.   There it is, in black and white. I don’t know when, or how, or why, but somewhere along the line my brain, my struggles with scrupulosity, and a bunch of ideas that I had knotted together had turned grace from something beautiful into something terrifying. It wasn’t the high point on the horizon I was supposed to aim for. It was the looming Mount Everest, it was all about being good and holy and right.... Read more

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