Today is the first Sunday of Advent. Advent is about waiting. But it is far more and very different from a waiting game. The Cambridge Dictionary defines “waiting game” as a “situation in which you delay taking any action, so that you can watch how a situation develops and see what it is best for you to do.” Those of us who are experiencing crises don’t have the luxury to engage in such waiting games in which no action is... Read more
Cultivating a spirit of thankfulness is life changing. There’s a major difference between seeing life as a cup half empty (or less) and life as a cup half full (or more). This post is about seeing Thanksgiving not just as a day. Giving thanks is a way of life. We are nearing three years since my adult son’s catastrophic brain injury. I will not hide from the fact that so much has been taken away from him, his wife and... Read more
This post is about the need to explore the space of widening the range of our emotions for human flourishing. Saturday had been a gloomy, rainy day. But the report I received upon arrival at my son Christopher’s adult care facility was hardly gloomy or rainy. Christopher had manifested a widening range of emotions on Saturday, as well as in recent days. I do not ever take his emotional activity for granted since his traumatic brain injury in January 2021.... Read more
This post is about the importance of taking one day at a time when living with prolonged trauma. Saturday evening was rough. I had just arrived at my adult son Christopher’s room in his care facility following a two-day leadership retreat I helped lead. As soon as I walked into Christopher’s room, his CNA urged me to get him to the hospital. She is the most amazing caregiver. She treats Christopher as if he were her brother. Christopher looked miserable... Read more
How often is our behavior non-purposeful, without intention, and without conscious awareness? How often is our behavior purposeful, intentional, and conscious of others’ well-being? I got to thinking about this subject the past few days, as I reflected on the theme of automatism. This post reflects upon the need for purposeful regard for other persons’ wellbeing if we are to experience human progress. I mentioned “automatism” above. So, what is automatism? According to the American Psychological Association, automatism is “nonpurposeful... Read more
I was role-playing with my six-year-old granddaughter Jaylah the other day. She had her tired, old grandpa on his hands and knees as she stood confidently before me eye to eye. I was an alligator, and she was a fairy princess. At one point, she paused to reflect on what she would say next. She pondered and then proclaimed: “What’s that word again? Oh yeah, bow down to me!” What is a good-natured and tired alligator like me to do... Read more
I’m always searching for signs of conscious control when visiting my son Christopher at his adult care facility. To the nurse on duty or a CNA or a respiratory therapist I ask, “Have you witnessed any signs of conscious control in Christopher today?” or something to that effect. The same question surfaces when thinking about God and about my own approach to life. This post focuses on the importance of searching for and finding signs of conscious control amid life’s... Read more
My granddaughter Jaylah started talking about platypuses on the ride home from ballet practice the other day. I interjected: “I would like to be a platypus.” Jaylah immediately retorted: “That’s not possible, Grandpa. You’re a grownup…You’re a person.” Well, to her point, I cannot scientifically become a platypus as a grownup human person. Still, I want to become like this amazing creature. The platypus is a wonderful example of successful adaptation. This is a post on the importance of special... Read more
One of the leaders at my son’s care facility likes to share a quote from the film, Patch Adams. The film stars Robin Williams. The quote reads, “You treat a disease: you win, you lose. You treat a person I guarantee you win—no matter the outcome.” (Here is a link to the video clip including the quote) This post is about applying this mindset to every sphere of life, including healthcare. I find that healthcare workers who take this approach... Read more
My wife Mariko and I celebrated 33 years of marriage Friday. I told our adult son Christopher at his adult care facility in the afternoon that Mom and I were celebrating our 33rd anniversary. Christopher suddenly made a few interesting gestures, which I assumed were in response to what I shared. After visiting with Christopher for some time, I headed home to pick up my wife and head out to dinner. Over dinner, my wife and I reflected on all... Read more
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