Six Tips For Engaging in Conflict Without Destroying One Another

3)   Die to ego

The number one killer of all relationships is ego. A need to make it about ME. When it comes to relationships, we want to be right more than we want to love.

Conflict becomes negative as we fight harder and harder to force, manipulate, or berate the other party into having it our way. Our culture considers ‘losing’ conflict as a giant sign of weakness. In order to avoid feeling that weakness, we turn into monsters and nothing matters but the preservation of self.

We cast ourselves in the role of victim and start to wonder why this other being is attacking us! We justify our behavior by citing the behavior of others. We demand control of the other. We give up control/responsibility of ourselves.

Conflict is not King of The Mountain. If you’re left on top with a trophy and everyone else is bruised and bloodied below you, you haven’t won.